在日常繁忙的生活，也不要忘記了放松自己。下面學(xué)習(xí)啦小編為大家?guī)?lái)幽默生活英語(yǔ)笑話四則，希望大家喜歡!

　　幽默生活英語(yǔ)笑話：誰(shuí)更丑

　　Abraham Lincoln's ability to laugh at himself sustained him through his many adversities. One example he often recalled was the time when an ugly man thrust a revolver in his face. Lincoln tried to remain calm, asking the man what he wanted. The man replied, holding the gun to Lincoln's head, "Some years ago I swore that if I ever came across an uglier man than myself, I'd shoot him on the spot."

　　亞伯拉罕·林肯自我解嘲的才智幫助他度過(guò)了許多災(zāi)難。他經(jīng)?；叵肫鹨粋€(gè)例子，一次一個(gè)丑陋的男子用一把左輪手槍頂在了他的臉上。林肯努力保持鎮(zhèn)靜，問(wèn)那人想要什么。那人用槍指著他的頭，回答說(shuō):“多年前我發(fā)過(guò)誓，如果見(jiàn)到一個(gè)比我還丑的人，我就當(dāng)場(chǎng)擊斃他。”

　　Relief crossed Lincoln's face and he lost all his tension and anxiety. "Shoot me," he said to the stranger, "for if I am an uglier man than you, I don't want to live."

　　一絲欣慰掠過(guò)林肯的面龐，他的緊張和焦慮一掃而光。“開(kāi)槍吧，”他對(duì)那個(gè)陌生人說(shuō)，“因?yàn)橐俏冶饶氵€丑，我就不想活了。”

　　幽默生活英語(yǔ)笑話：新年決心書

　　Hoping to excite student interest in our reading center, I asked each teacher to write a New Year's resolution on a special form and send it to me. After I posted the resolutions on the bulletin board in the reading center，one young teacher stopped by，looked at them for a few minutes，and then left abruptly. Passing two teachers on their way in，she stormed，“My resolution isn’t posted-and mine was one of the first ones ins”I couldn't help but overheard,and the tone of her voice sent me flying to my desk in reach of a misplaced resolution.Looking rapidly through stacks of papers，I uncovered hers. It read，“I resolve not to let little things upset me.”

　　為了激勵(lì)同學(xué)們對(duì)我們閱覽中心的興趣，我請(qǐng)每位老師在一張?zhí)刂频谋砀裆蠈懸黄履隂Q心書交給我。我將決心書張貼在閱覽中心的布告牌上之后，一位年輕老師停下來(lái)看了幾分鐘，便抽身走開(kāi)了。她越過(guò)兩位老師闖了進(jìn)來(lái)，大發(fā)雷霆道:“我的決心書竟然沒(méi)有貼出來(lái)—而我的是第一批交上來(lái)的!”我在旁邊聽(tīng)到了，看她氣勢(shì)洶洶的樣子，我嚇得趕緊跑回辦公室去找那份放錯(cuò)了地方的決心書，飛快瀏覽了幾疊紙之后，我打開(kāi)了她的那一份，上面寫著:“我決心不再為一些小事而煩惱。”

　　幽默生活英語(yǔ)笑話：鑰匙?接吻

　　A friend of mine was giving an English lesson to a class of adults who had recently come to live in the United States. After placing quite a number of everyday objects on a table，he asked various members of the class to give him the ruler, the book，the pen and so on. The class went very smoothly and the students seemed interested and serious about the work that they were engaged in until when my friend turned to an Italian student and said，"Give me the keys. "The man looked surprised and somewhat at a loss. Seeing this，my friend thought that the student hadn’t heard him Clearly，so he repeated. "Give me the keys.”The Italian shrugged his shoulders. Then，he threw his arms around the teacher's neck and kissed him on both cheeks.

　　我的一位朋友在給一個(gè)成人學(xué)生班級(jí)上英語(yǔ)課。他們都是新近來(lái)美國(guó)生活的。在一張桌子上擺了許多日常用品之后，他請(qǐng)全班同學(xué)給他挑出尺子、書本、鋼筆等。課進(jìn)行得井然有序，學(xué)生們對(duì)自己所做的似乎很感興趣，也很認(rèn)真。后來(lái)輪到一名來(lái)自意大利的學(xué)生，我的朋友說(shuō):“給我鑰匙。”那人看起來(lái)非常吃驚，也有點(diǎn)手足無(wú)措。看到這種情況，我的朋友想是他沒(méi)有聽(tīng)清楚，于是又重復(fù)了一遍:“給我鑰匙。”那位意大利學(xué)生聳了聳肩。接著，他伸出胳膊摟住老師的脖子在雙頰上親了兩下。

　　幽默生活英語(yǔ)笑話：那是做什么用的

　　While proudly showing off his newapartment to friends，a college student led theway into the den. "What is the big brass gongand hammer ford "One of his friends asked."That is the talking clock.”the man replied.“How does it work!”

　　一個(gè)學(xué)生帶他朋友們參觀他的新公寓，甚是得意。“那個(gè)大銅鑼和錘子是干什么用的?”他的一個(gè)朋友問(wèn)他。“那玩意兒厲害了，那是一個(gè)會(huì)說(shuō)話的鐘”，學(xué)生回答。“這鐘怎么工作的?”

　　"Watch，”the man said and proceeded togive the gong an ear shattering pound with thehammer. Suddenly，someone screamed fromthe other side of the wall，“Knock it off，you idiots It’s two 0’clock in the morning”

　　他的朋友問(wèn)。“看著，別眨眼了”，那學(xué)生走上前一把操起銅鑼和錘子，拼命地敲了一下，聲音震耳欲聾。突然，他們聽(tīng)到隔壁墻那邊有人狂叫，“別敲了，你這白癡!現(xiàn)在是凌晨?jī)牲c(diǎn)鐘了!”