英語(yǔ)經(jīng)典幽默故事四則

　　在日常繁忙的生活，也不要忘記了放松自己。下面學(xué)習(xí)啦小編為大家?guī)?lái)經(jīng)典幽默英語(yǔ)故事四則，希望大家喜歡!

　　經(jīng)典幽默英語(yǔ)故事：好消息和壞消息

　　A man gets a telephone call from a doctor. The doctor says: "About this medical test I did on you，I have some good news and some bad news.”

　　一個(gè)男人接到一了一位醫(yī)生打來(lái)的電話。醫(yī)生說(shuō):“是關(guān)于我給你做過(guò)的體檢的事，有個(gè)好消息還有個(gè)壞消息。”

　　The man asks for the good news first:

　　那個(gè)男人先要聽(tīng)好消息:

　　"The good news is that you have 24 hours to live,” says the doctor.

　　“好消息就是你還能活24小時(shí)。”醫(yī)生說(shuō)。

　　The man, incredulously: "If that is the good news, then what is the bad news??"

　　那個(gè)男人覺(jué)得有些不可思議說(shuō):“如果那叫做好消息的話，那壞消息是什么呢?”

　　"I couldn’t reach you on the phone yesterday.”

　　“我昨天打電話找不到你。”

　　經(jīng)典幽默英語(yǔ)故事：中獎(jiǎng)

　　A man rushes into his house and yells to his w wife，"Martha, pack up your things. I just won the California lottery!”

　　一個(gè)男人沖進(jìn)家門(mén)對(duì)他的妻子大聲嚷:“瑪莎，收拾你的行李，我剛剛底了加州彩券!”

　　Martha replies, "Shall I pack for warm weather or cold?"

　　瑪莎問(wèn):“我是該帶冬裝還是夏裝呢?”

　　The man responds，"I don’t care. Just so long as you’re out of the house by noon!”

　　那個(gè)男人回答說(shuō):“我可不管，只要你能盡快地搬出這個(gè)房子!”

　　經(jīng)典幽默英語(yǔ)故事：每個(gè)人都這樣嗎

　　Lifeguard: "I’ve been watching you sir, and you’11 have to stop urinating in the pool.”

　　救生員:“我已經(jīng)觀察你很久了，先生，你不能往游泳池里小便。”

　　Man: "But everybody urinates in the pool.”

　　男人:“但每個(gè)人都在游泳池里小便呀。”

　　Lifeguard: "From the diving board? "

　　救生員:“從跳板上嗎?”

　　經(jīng)典幽默英語(yǔ)故事：陸軍與海軍的較量

　　An Army guy and a Navy guy found themselves in a public restroom. As the Army guy was walking out, the Navy guy id，while washing his hands，"In the Navy，they teach us to wash our hands before leaving; the restroom.” Then the Army guy replied, "Well，in the Army，they teach us not to pee on our hands!”

　　一個(gè)陸軍士兵和一個(gè)海軍士兵在一個(gè)公共衛(wèi)生間碰面，當(dāng)陸軍士兵從咀面走出來(lái)時(shí)，正在洗手的海軍士兵說(shuō):“在海軍，我們學(xué)到了上_完廁所后要洗手。”接著陸軍士兵回答說(shuō):“在陸軍，沒(méi)有人教我們往手里撒尿!”