趣味幽默笑話四則閱讀
趣味幽默笑話四則閱讀
在日常繁忙的生活,也不要忘記了放松自己。下面學(xué)習(xí)啦小編為大家?guī)?lái)趣味幽默笑話四則,希望大家喜歡!
趣味幽默笑話:拿破侖病了
Jack had gone to the university to study history, but at the end of his first year, his history professor failed him in his examinations, and he was told that he would have to leave the university. However, his father decided that he would go to see the professor to urge him to let Jack continue his studies the following year.
杰克到一所大學(xué)去學(xué)歷史。第一學(xué)期結(jié)束時(shí),歷史課教授沒(méi)讓他及格。學(xué)校讓他退學(xué)。然而,杰克的父親決定去見(jiàn)教授,強(qiáng)烈要求讓杰克繼續(xù)來(lái)年的學(xué)業(yè)。
“He’s a good boy,” said Jack’s father" and if you let him pass this time,I’m sure he’11 improve a lot next year and pass the examinations at the end of it really well.”
“他是個(gè)好孩子,”杰克的父親說(shuō):“您要是讓他這次及格,我相信他明年會(huì)有很大進(jìn)步,學(xué)期結(jié)束時(shí),他一定會(huì)考好的。”
“No, no, that’s quite impossible,” replied the professor immediately. "Do you know, last month I asked him when Napoleon had died, he didn't know!”
“不,不,那不可能,”教授馬上回答。“你知道嗎?上個(gè)月我問(wèn)他拿破侖什么時(shí)候死的,他都不知道。”
"Please, sir, give him another chance,” said Jack’s father. "You see, I' m afraid we don't take any newspaper in our house, so none of us even know that Napoleon was ill.”
“先生,請(qǐng)?jiān)俳o他一次機(jī)會(huì)吧。”杰克的父親說(shuō):“你不知道,恐怕是因?yàn)槲覀兗覜](méi)有訂報(bào)紙。我們家的人連拿破侖病了都不知道。”
趣味幽默笑話:災(zāi)難
One of my favorite teachers at Southeast Missouri State University in Cape Girardeau was known of his droll sense of humor. Explaining his ground rules to freshman class,he said, "Now I know my lectures can often be dry and boring, so I don't mind if you look at your watches during class. I do,however, object to your pounding them on the desk to make sure they’re still running.”
位于吉拉多海角的密蘇里東南州立大學(xué)有一位我非常喜歡的老師,他奇特的幽默感很是出名。在對(duì)一個(gè)新生班級(jí)講解他的基本原則時(shí),他說(shuō):“我知道我的講課可能經(jīng)常會(huì)枯燥乏味,了無(wú)興趣,所以如果你們?cè)谏险n時(shí)看表我并不介意。不過(guò)我堅(jiān)決反對(duì)你們將表在課桌上猛敲,看它們是不是還在走。”
趣味幽默笑話:父親的職業(yè)
A grade school teacher was asking students what their parents did for a living.
小學(xué)老師正在問(wèn)孩子們他們雙親的職業(yè)。
Timmy stood up and said, "My mom is a Doctor!”
迪米站起來(lái)說(shuō):“我母親是名醫(yī)生。”
Sarah stood up and said, "My father is Professor!”
莎拉站起來(lái)說(shuō):“我父親是位教授。”
Little Johnny stood up and said, "My ad is a piano player in a whorehouse!”
小約翰尼站起來(lái)說(shuō),“我爹地在妓院演奏鋼琴。”
The teacher couldn’t believe what she ad just heard, so she made a point of calling Little Johnny's father that evening.
老師不敢相信她所聽(tīng)到的話,于是她決定晚上給小約翰尼的爸爸打電話問(wèn)個(gè)清楚。
When she told him what Little Johnny had said,he told her, "Actually. . . I’m an attorney, but how am I supposed to explain that to a seven一year old?"
等她告訴小約翰尼的父親后,約翰尼的父親對(duì)她說(shuō),“事實(shí)上,我是一名律師,但我怎么能向一個(gè)七歲的小孩解釋清楚這個(gè)職業(yè)?”
趣味幽默笑話:羅馬是什么時(shí)候建成的
Teacher: When was Rome built?
教師:羅馬是在什么時(shí)候建成的?
Tom: At night.
湯姆:在夜里。
Teacher: Who told you that?
教師:是誰(shuí)告訴你的?
Tom: You did. You said" Rome wasn’t built in a day".
湯姆:是您。您說(shuō)過(guò)“羅馬不是在一個(gè)白天建成的”。