簡(jiǎn)單的英語(yǔ)笑話(huà)8篇

　　下面是學(xué)習(xí)啦小編整理的簡(jiǎn)單英語(yǔ)笑話(huà)，歡迎大家閱讀!

　　簡(jiǎn)單英語(yǔ)笑話(huà)：If I Am a Manager

　　One day in class, the teacher assigned his students to write a composition – if I Am a Manager.

　　All the students began to write except a boy. The teacher went to him and asked the reason.

　　“I am waiting for my secretary,” was the boy’s answer.

　　一天課上，老師要同學(xué)們以“如果我是一個(gè)經(jīng)理”為題寫(xiě)一篇作文。

　　所有的學(xué)生都在動(dòng)筆寫(xiě)了，只有一個(gè)男生例外。老師走過(guò)去問(wèn)他為什么不寫(xiě)。

　　“我在等我的秘書(shū)”。那孩子答道。

　　簡(jiǎn)單英語(yǔ)笑話(huà)：Isn’t it wonderful?

　　"What are you so happy about?"a woman asked the 98-year-old man.

　　"I broke a mirror," he replied.

　　"But that means seven years of bad luck."

　　"I know." he said, beaming,"Isn’t it wonderful?"

　　這難道不好嗎?

　　“你高興什么?”一個(gè)女士問(wèn)一個(gè)98歲的老人。

　　“我打碎了一個(gè)鏡子。”他回答。

　　“但那預(yù)示著7年的壞運(yùn)氣。”

　　“我知道。”他高興地說(shuō)，“這難道不好嗎?”

　　簡(jiǎn)單英語(yǔ)笑話(huà)：Whats time to a pig?

　　One day a visitor from the city came to a small rural area to drive around the country roads, see how the farms looked, and perhaps to see how farmers earned their living. The city man saw a farmer in his yard, holding a pig up in his hands, and lifting it so that the pig could eat apples from an apple tree. The city man said to the farmer," I see that your pig likes apples, but isn"t that quite a waste of time?" The farmer replied," What"s time to a pig?"

　　一天，有一個(gè)城市里的游客來(lái)到一個(gè)小鄉(xiāng)村，在鄉(xiāng)間路上開(kāi)著車(chē)，想看看農(nóng)莊是什么樣子，也想看看農(nóng)夫怎樣種田過(guò)日子。這位城里人看見(jiàn)一位農(nóng)夫在宅后的草地 上，手中抱著一頭豬，并把它舉得高高的，好讓它能夠吃到樹(shù)上的蘋(píng)果。城里人對(duì)農(nóng)夫說(shuō)，"我看你的豬挺喜歡吃蘋(píng)果的，但是，這不是很浪費(fèi)時(shí)間嗎?"那位農(nóng)夫 回答說(shuō)，“時(shí)間對(duì)豬有什么意義?”

　　簡(jiǎn)單英語(yǔ)笑話(huà)：我和老師的故事

　　Teacher: Tom and John! Why are you late for school today?

　　老師：湯姆!約翰!你倆今天為什么遲到了!

　　Tom: Madam, I lost a one-dollar coin and was searching for it.

　　湯姆：老師，我一直在找我丟失的一美元硬幣。

　　Teachear: John, what about you?

　　老師：那么你呢，約翰?

　　John: Madam, I was not able to move beacause I was hiding that coin under my feet.

　　約翰：老師，我不能動(dòng)啊，我把他的硬幣藏腳底下了。

　　簡(jiǎn)單英語(yǔ)笑話(huà)：Goldfish 金魚(yú)

　　Stan: I won 92 goldfish.

　　斯丹：我贏(yíng)了 92 條金魚(yú)。

　　Fred: Where are you going to keep them?

　　弗雷德：你想在哪兒養(yǎng)它們?

　　Stan: In the bathroom.

　　斯丹：浴室。

　　Fred: But what will you do when you want to take a bath?

　　弗雷德：但是你想洗澡時(shí)怎么辦?

　　Stan: Blindfold(蒙眼睛) them!

　　斯丹：蒙住它們的眼睛!

　　簡(jiǎn)單英語(yǔ)笑話(huà)：你以為你是誰(shuí)?Who do you think you are?

　　The bus was crowded, and as one more man tried to get on, the passengers wouldn’t let him aboard.

　　“It is too crowded, “they shouted.” who do you think you are?”

　　“I am the driver.” he said.

　　公共汽車(chē)上很擠，當(dāng)又一個(gè)人還是試圖上車(chē)時(shí)，乘客們不讓他上。

　　“車(chē)上太擠了，”他們喊道，“你以為你是誰(shuí)?”

　　“我是司機(jī)!”他說(shuō)。

　　簡(jiǎn)單英語(yǔ)笑話(huà)：瘋?cè)嗽?The Looney Bin

　　Late one night at the insane asylum (瘋?cè)嗽?one inmate shouted, "I am Napoleon!”Another one said, "How do you know?"

　　The first inmate said, "God told me!"

　　Just then, a voice from another room shouted, "I did not!"

　　一天晚上，在瘋?cè)嗽豪铮粋€(gè)病人說(shuō)：“我是拿破侖!”另一個(gè)說(shuō)：“你怎么知道?”第一個(gè)人說(shuō)：“上帝對(duì)我說(shuō)的!”一會(huì)兒，一個(gè)聲音從另一個(gè)房間傳來(lái)：“我沒(méi)說(shuō)!”

　　簡(jiǎn)單英語(yǔ)笑話(huà)：狗也知道這個(gè)諺語(yǔ)嗎?

　　The little boy did not like the look of the barking dog.

　　"It's all right," said a gentleman, "don't be afraid. Don't you know the proverb: Barking dogs don't bite?"

　　"Ah, yes," answered the little boy. "I know the proverb, but does the dog know the proverb, too?"

　　一個(gè)小男孩非常不喜歡狗狂叫的樣子。

　　“沒(méi)有關(guān)系，”一位先生“啊，我是知道，可是狗也知道嗎?”