英語(yǔ)幽默小故事16篇_英語(yǔ)趣味小故事(2)
英語(yǔ)幽默小故事11：He Was Only Wrong by Two
Jack Hawkins was the football coach at an Amercian college, and he was always trying to find good players, but they weren‘t always smart enought to be accepted by the college.
One day the coach brought an excellent young player to the dean of the college and asked that the student be allowed to enter without an examination. "Well," the dean said after some persuasion, "I‘d better ask him a few questions first."
Then he turned to the student and asked him some very easy questions, but the student didn‘t know any of the answers.
At last the dean said, "Well, what‘s five times seven?"
The student thought for a long time and then answered, "Thirty-six."
The dean threw up his hands and looked at the coach in despair, but the coach said earnestly, "Oh, please let him in, sir! He was only wrong by two."
幽默故事翻譯：他的得數(shù)只比正確答案多二
杰克霍金斯是美國(guó)一所學(xué)院的橄欖球隊(duì)教練，他竭力想物色好球員。但是好球員學(xué)業(yè)不行，院方不愿錄取。
有一天，教練帶著一位優(yōu)秀的年輕球員去見(jiàn)院長(zhǎng)，希望院方同意他免試入學(xué)。經(jīng)過(guò)一番勸說(shuō)后院長(zhǎng)說(shuō)：“那我最好先問(wèn)問(wèn)他幾個(gè)問(wèn)題?！?/p>
然后他轉(zhuǎn)向?qū)W生，問(wèn)了幾個(gè)非常簡(jiǎn)單的問(wèn)題。可是那個(gè)學(xué)生一個(gè)也答不上來(lái)。
最后院長(zhǎng)說(shuō)：“那么，五乘七得多少?”
學(xué)生想了很久，然后回答說(shuō)：“三十六。”
院長(zhǎng)攤開(kāi)雙手失望地看了看教練。可是教練認(rèn)真地說(shuō)，“噢，錄取他吧，先生。他的答案只比正確答案多二?！?/p>
英語(yǔ)幽默小故事12：Real Play
When I taught the introduction-to-theater course at North Dakota State University, I required my students to attend the university theater‘s current production and write a critique. After viewing a particularly fine performance, one student wrote: "The play was so real, I thought I was actually sitting on my couch at home, watching it on television."
幽默故事翻譯：逼真的戲劇
我在北達(dá)科他州立大學(xué)教戲劇入門課時(shí)，要求學(xué)生們?nèi)タ磳W(xué)校劇團(tuán)當(dāng)時(shí)的演出，并寫一篇評(píng)論?？戳艘粓?chǎng)極為精彩的演出后，一名學(xué)生寫道：“這部戲劇是如此逼真，以致于我認(rèn)為我自己是坐在家里的沙發(fā)上，從電視上看到的?！?/p>
英語(yǔ)幽默小故事13：A Fine Match
One day a lady saw a mouse running across her kitchen floor. She was very afraid of mouse, so she ran out of the house, got into a bus and went to the shops. There she bought a mousetrap. The shopkeeper said to her, "Put some cheese in it and you will soon catch that mouse."
The lady went home with her mousetrap, but when she looked in her cupboard, she could not find any cheese in it. She did not want to go back to the shop, because it was very late, so she cut a picture of some cheese out of a magazine and put that in the trap.
Surprisingly, the picture of the cheese was quite successful! When the lady came down to the kitchen the next morning she found a picture of a mouse in the trap beside the picture of the cheese!
幽默故事翻譯：勢(shì)均力敵
有一天某位女士看到一只老鼠在自家的廚房地板上竄過(guò)。她很害怕老鼠，所以她沖出屋子，搭上了公共汽車直奔商店。在那兒，她買了一只老鼠夾。店主告訴她：“放點(diǎn)奶酪在里面，很快你就會(huì)逮住那只老鼠的?！?/p>
這位女士帶著鼠夾回到家里，但她沒(méi)有在碗櫥里找到奶酪。她不想再回到商店里去，因?yàn)橐呀?jīng)很晚了。于是，她就從一份雜志中剪下一幅奶酪的圖片放進(jìn)了夾子。
令人稱奇的是，這畫有奶酪的圖片竟然奏效了!第二天早上，這位女士下樓到廚房時(shí)，發(fā)現(xiàn)鼠夾里奶酪圖片旁有一張畫有老鼠的圖片!
英語(yǔ)幽默小故事14：Gardening Gloves
For months I hinted that I needed a new wedding ring, since I had developed an allergy to gold. On my birthday, while I was gardening, my husband asked me for gift suggestions. I held my hands up and said, "Well, you‘ll notice that my hands are bare."
Later that evening I opened my present with enthusiasm. "Happy birthday," he said, as I unwrapped a new pair of gardening gloves.
幽默故事翻譯：園藝手套
幾個(gè)月以來(lái)，我一直在向丈夫暗示我需要一枚新的結(jié)婚戒指，因?yàn)槲覍?duì)黃金有點(diǎn)過(guò)敏。生日那天，我正在干園藝活時(shí)，丈夫問(wèn)我想要什么禮物。我舉起雙手說(shuō)：“嗯，你肯定看到了，我的兩手都是光光的?！?/p>
那天晚上，我滿懷熱情地拆開(kāi)了丈夫送的禮物?！吧湛鞓?lè)!”他說(shuō)。我打開(kāi)一看：里面包著一雙園藝手套。
英語(yǔ)幽默小故事15：Warning
Several weeks after our son began his freshman year at Alma College in Michigan, my husband and I decided to visit him. I was careful to call him a few days in advance to "warn" him that we would be coming. When we arrived at the dorm, however, I was taken aback by the disarray of his room. "Forgot we were coming, didn‘t you?" I teased.
"Are you kidding?" he replied, "Why else would I have bothered to clean?"
幽默故事翻譯：提醒
我們的兒子是密歇根州阿爾馬大學(xué)的新生，開(kāi)學(xué)幾個(gè)星期之后，我和丈夫決定去看看他。我特意提前給他打電話，“提醒”他我們將光臨。但是當(dāng)我們來(lái)到宿舍時(shí)，他的房間凌亂不堪，我非常吃驚?！巴宋覀円獊?lái)，是吧?”我取笑他。
“開(kāi)什么玩笑?“，他回答說(shuō)，“要不我憑什么費(fèi)神打掃?”
英語(yǔ)幽默小故事16：Ground Rules
One of my favorite teachers at Southeast Missouri State University in Cape Girardeau was known of his droll sense of humor. Explaining his ground rules to one freshman class, he said, "Now I know my lectures can often be dry and boring, so I don‘t mind if you look at your watches during class. I do, however, object to your pounding them on the desk to make sure they‘re still running."
幽默故事翻譯：基本原則
位于吉拉多海角的密蘇里東南州立大學(xué)有一位我非常喜歡的老師，他奇特的幽默感很是出名。在對(duì)一個(gè)新生班級(jí)講解他的基本原則時(shí)，他說(shuō)：“我知道我的講課可能經(jīng)常會(huì)枯燥乏味，了無(wú)生趣，所以如果你們?cè)谏险n時(shí)看表我并不介意。不過(guò)我堅(jiān)決反對(duì)你們將表在課桌上猛敲看它們是不是還在走?！?/p>
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