經(jīng)典英語(yǔ)笑話爆笑欣賞
經(jīng)典英語(yǔ)笑話爆笑欣賞
笑話是日常生活中常見(jiàn)的一種幽默。與一般日常會(huì)話不同,笑話刻意違反合作原則,由此衍生出會(huì)話含意,并利用會(huì)話含意之間的沖突實(shí)現(xiàn)其預(yù)定功能。小編精心收集了經(jīng)典爆笑英語(yǔ)笑話，供大家欣賞學(xué)習(xí)!
經(jīng)典爆笑英語(yǔ)笑話篇1
Mother asked her little boy, "Darling, what did the teacher teach you today?" "Nothing, Mum,"answered the son proundly, "instead, she asked me how much one plus two was, and I told herthree."
母親問(wèn)她年幼的兒子：“寶貝，今天老師教了你些什么?” 兒子驕傲地說(shuō)：“什么都沒(méi)教，媽媽。她反倒問(wèn)我一加二等于幾，我告訴她等于三。”
經(jīng)典爆笑英語(yǔ)笑話篇2
A schoolboy went home with a pain in his stomach. "Well, sit down and eat your tea," said his mother. "Your stomach's hurting because it's empty. It'll be all right when you've got something in it." Shortly afterwards Dad come in from the office, complaining of a headache. "That's because it's empty," said his bright son. "You'd be all right if you had something in it."
一個(gè)男孩放學(xué)回家時(shí)，覺(jué)得肚子痛。“來(lái)，坐下，吃點(diǎn)點(diǎn)心，”媽媽說(shuō)，“你肚子痛是因?yàn)槎亲邮强盏摹３渣c(diǎn)東西就會(huì)好的。” 一會(huì)兒，男孩的爸爸下班回家了，說(shuō)是頭痛。 “你頭痛是因?yàn)槟愕哪X袋是空的，”他那聰明的兒子說(shuō)，“里面裝點(diǎn)東西，就會(huì)好的。”
經(jīng)典爆笑英語(yǔ)笑話篇3
Bill is a good student and an intelligent boy. He likes to study arithmetic, and he can do all ofthe arithmetic problems in his book easily. One day on his way to school Bill passed a fruitstore. There was a sign in the window which said, "Apple-Six for five cents." An idea came to Billand he went into the store. "How much are the apples?" he asked the store. "Six for five cents." "But I don't want six apples." "How many apples do you want?" "It is not a question of howmany apples I want. It is a problem in arithmetic." "What do you mean by a problem inarithmetic?" asked the man. "Well, if six apples are wroth five cents, then five apples are worthfour cents, four apples are worth three cents, three apples are worth rwo cents, two apples areworth one cent and one apple is worth nothing. I only want one apple, and if one apple is worthnothing then it is not necessary for me to pay you." Bill picked out a good apple, began to eatit, and walked happily out of the store. The man looked at the young boy with such surprisethat he could not say a word.
比爾是一個(gè)好學(xué)生，也是個(gè)聰明的孩子。他喜歡學(xué)數(shù)學(xué)，課本上所有的數(shù)學(xué)問(wèn)題他都能不費(fèi)勁地解答。 有一天，在上學(xué)路上，比爾經(jīng)過(guò)一家水果店。該店窗戶上有個(gè)招牌上寫(xiě)著：“蘋(píng)果--五美分六個(gè)。”比爾腦筋一轉(zhuǎn)，進(jìn)了店門(mén)。 “蘋(píng)果怎么賣(mài)?” “五美分六個(gè)。” “但我不想要六個(gè)。” “你想要幾個(gè)?” “這不是我想要幾個(gè)的問(wèn)題。這是個(gè)數(shù)學(xué)問(wèn)題。” “數(shù)學(xué)問(wèn)題?你說(shuō)這話是什么意思?” “你看，如果六個(gè)蘋(píng)果五美分，那么五個(gè)蘋(píng)果四美分，四個(gè)蘋(píng)果三美分，三個(gè)蘋(píng)果二美分，二個(gè)蘋(píng)果一美分，一個(gè)蘋(píng)果就不要錢(qián)。我只要一個(gè)蘋(píng)果，如果一個(gè)蘋(píng)果一分錢(qián)也不要的話，那我也就沒(méi)必要給你錢(qián)了。” 比爾揀了一個(gè)好蘋(píng)果，開(kāi)始吃了起來(lái)，然后興高采烈地邁出了店門(mén)。那個(gè)售貨員吃驚地望著這個(gè)小男孩，一句話也說(shuō)不出來(lái)。
經(jīng)典爆笑英語(yǔ)笑話篇4
Jimmy started painting when he was three years old, and when he was five, he was already verygood at it. He painted many beautiful and interesting pictures, and people paid a lot of moneyfor them. They said, "This boy's going to be famous when he's little older, and then we're goingto sell these pictures for a lot more money." Jimmy's pictures were different from other people'sbecause he never painted on all of the paper. He painted on half of it, and the other half wasalways empty. "That's very clever," everyone said, "Nobody else does that!" One day somebodybought one of Jimmy's pictures and then said to him, "Please tell me this, Jimmy. Why do youpaint on the bottom half of your pictures, but not on the top half?" "Because I'm small," Jimmysaid, "and my burshes don't reach very high."
吉米三歲開(kāi)始畫(huà)畫(huà)，五歲時(shí)已經(jīng)畫(huà)得很好了。他畫(huà)了很多美麗而有趣的畫(huà)，人們出高價(jià)購(gòu)買(mǎi)。他們說(shuō)，“這個(gè)孩子長(zhǎng)大一點(diǎn)肯定會(huì)出名，我們可以靠這些畫(huà)大賺一筆。” 吉米的畫(huà)與眾不同。因?yàn)樗麖膩?lái)不在整張紙上作畫(huà)。他只畫(huà)一半的紙，而另一半他總空著。 “構(gòu)思多么巧妙啊!”大家都說(shuō)，“從來(lái)沒(méi)有人這么做過(guò)。” 有一天，一個(gè)人買(mǎi)了吉米的畫(huà)，然后問(wèn)他：“請(qǐng)告訴我，吉米，你為什么總是在紙的下半部分畫(huà)畫(huà)，而不是在紙的上半部分?” 吉米說(shuō)，“因?yàn)槲覀€(gè)頭小，夠不著上面。”
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