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學(xué)習(xí)啦>學(xué)習(xí)英語>英語閱讀>英語笑話>

英語小笑話大全

時(shí)間: 韋彥867 分享

  笑話是日常生活中人們消遣娛樂的一種常見語言現(xiàn)象,其目的在于在會(huì)話過程中傳遞和激發(fā)幽默感。小編精心收集了爆笑英文笑話短文,供大家欣賞學(xué)習(xí)!

  爆笑英文笑話短文篇1

  I didn't take that in

  我沒有把藥吃下去

  A fellow who was rather slow on the uptake had been suffering from constipation, so the doctor provided him with some suppositories.

  有位理解能力相當(dāng)遲緩的老兄一直為便秘所苦,因此醫(yī)生給他一些利腸的栓劑。

  A week later, the patient came back to tell the doctor that his condition had not improved.

  一星期后病人回來告訴醫(yī)生,他的狀況尚未改進(jìn)。

  "I'm amazed," said the doctor. " Have you been taking the medicine I prescribed for you?"

  “我覺得好奇怪,”醫(yī)生說。“你有沒有采用我開給你的藥方呢?”

  "What do you think I've been doing, shoving it up my ass?"

  “你以為我做什么呢?難道要我把它們都塞進(jìn)屁股里嗎?”

  爆笑英文笑話短文篇2

  You said what?

  你說什么?

  Moe, Larry and Curly had been stranded on a desert island. They were walking alongdisconsolately when Moe happened to kick a bottle lying in the sand. The bottle broke and agenie suddenly emerged before them.

  莫伊、賴?yán)途砻虼|礁擱淺而被困在一個(gè)無人荒島上,他們寂寞無助地沿岸邊走著,這時(shí)莫伊踢到沙灘上一只瓶子,那只瓶子破了后,突然出現(xiàn)一個(gè)精靈。

  "Thank you. oh Masters, for releasing me from my captivity. For your kindness, please allow meto grant you each a wish. "

  “謝謝你們從囚禁我的瓶子中把我放出來,我的主人。為了報(bào)答你們的恩惠,請(qǐng)讓我為每位實(shí)現(xiàn)一個(gè)愿望。”

  "Well, it's not too difficult to figure out what I want," said Moe. "I wish I were back home. "

  “哦,我的愿望很容易想出來,”莫伊說。“我希望我能回到家里。”

  No sooner had he said the words than he was back in dear old Brooklyn.

  話一說完,莫伊就已在他可愛的布魯克林老家中。

  "I want to be back home, too," said I Larry, and he, too, was instantly transported.

  “我也想回家,”賴?yán)f,他馬上也就被送走了。

  " Gee, it's alone some here without Moe and Larry," said Curly. "I wish they were here to keepme company. "

  “唉,沒有莫伊和賴?yán)?,一個(gè)人在這里真無聊,”卷毛說。“我希望他們能回到這里陪伴我。”

  爆笑英文笑話短文篇3

  Oh,good job

  哦,你做的真好

  Moe, Larry, and Curly were wandering in the Arabian desert when they were captured by a bandof ferocious Bedouin.

  莫伊。賴?yán)途砻齻€(gè)傻瓜走在阿拉伯沙漠中時(shí),一群殘暴的貝都因人把他們抓了起來。

  "By the code of the desert you miserable infidels must be destroyed," declared their savageleader. "Set up the guillotine !"

  “依據(jù)我們沙漠的規(guī)定,你們這些可憐的異教徒必須被處死,”野蠻的首領(lǐng)說道。“把斷頭臺(tái)架設(shè)好。”

  Moe was the first to be ordered to the death instrument.

  莫伊首先被命令上斷頭臺(tái)。

  The blade descended but, amazingly, stopped just short of his neck.

  但令人驚訝的是,刀具落下時(shí)在接近脖子地方就停止不動(dòng)了。

  "It's a miracle! " declared the Arab. "Release him!"

  “這是個(gè)奇跡!”這位阿拉伯人說道。“把他放走!”

  Next, Larry placed his head under the huge, razor-sharp blade. But once again it stoppedshort of his neck.

  接著賴?yán)杨^放在像剃刀刀片一樣銳利的大刀之下,但又一次刀子在接近他的頸部地方停了下來。

  "By Allah, another miracle!" affirmed the sheik once more. "Release him! "

  “奉阿拉真主之命,又是另一個(gè)奇跡!”酋長又一次宣布。“放了他!”

  Finally, Curly was led to the ominous device. Looking closely he noticed a splinter of woodblocking the path of the blade.

  最后卷毛被帶到那不吉利的斷頭臺(tái)上,仔細(xì)察看后,他發(fā)現(xiàn)一塊小木片擋住了刀鋒的去路。

  "Well, no wonder it's not working," he announced.

  “難怪它沒反應(yīng),”他大聲說道。

  "Here's your problem right here."

  “你們的問題就在這里”

  
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