簡(jiǎn)單容易的英語(yǔ)短笑話(huà)
冷笑話(huà)是近幾年才出現(xiàn)的新興語(yǔ)言現(xiàn)象，它以網(wǎng)絡(luò)為主要的傳播方式。小編精心收集了簡(jiǎn)單容易的英語(yǔ)短笑話(huà)，供大家欣賞學(xué)習(xí)!
簡(jiǎn)單容易的英語(yǔ)短笑話(huà)篇1
A construction worker was rushed to the hospital after cutting himself badly. The doctor told the nurse to prepare a painkiller. "Don’t bother Doctor," said the man. "I' ve been through a lot worse."
一個(gè)傷痕累累的建筑工人沖進(jìn)了一家醫(yī)院，醫(yī)生馬上讓護(hù)士去拿止痛藥，“不必麻煩您了，醫(yī)生。”那人說(shuō)道，“比這更痛的傷我都經(jīng)歷過(guò)了。”
"More painful than this?" the doctor asked.
“比現(xiàn)在的傷還要痛嗎?”醫(yī)生問(wèn)。
"I’11 tell you about the second most painful accident I ever had. I was hunting one day and had to take a shit so I dropped my pants and squatted. I tripped a bear trap and BOOM，the thing snapped shut on my balls."
“我先說(shuō)說(shuō)讓我感到還不是最痛苦的那件事吧，一天我在打獵的時(shí)候突然想要大便，于是就脫掉褲子蹲在地上，不料被捕熊的夾子絆倒了，那東西夾住了我的皋丸。”
The doctor winced, "That’s awful. But tell me, what could be worse?"
醫(yī)生聽(tīng)后顫抖了一下，說(shuō)道“太可怕了，那告訴我什么又是最痛苦的事呢?”
"When I reached the end of the chain."
“當(dāng)我摸到鎖鏈盡端的時(shí)候。”
簡(jiǎn)單容易的英語(yǔ)短笑話(huà)篇2
A farmer purchases an old，run-down, abandoned farm with plans to turn it into a thriving enterprise. The fields are grown over with weeds，the farmhouse is falling apart，and the fences are collapsing all around.
一個(gè)農(nóng)民買(mǎi)了一塊破舊荒廢的農(nóng)場(chǎng)，他準(zhǔn)備把這塊農(nóng)場(chǎng)變成興旺的園林。然而目前這塊地是雜草叢生，房屋破舊不堪，四周的籬笆也是東倒西歪。
During his first day of work，the town preacher stops by to bless the man’s work，saying, "May you and God work together to make this the farm of your dreams!”
在他第一天工作的時(shí)候，城里的一個(gè)傳教士給他送去了祝福:“愿上帝與你一起實(shí)現(xiàn)你的夢(mèng)想吧!”
A few months later, the preacher stops by again to call on the farmer. I}ok and behold，it’s like a completely different place-the farmhouse is completely rebuilt and in excellent condition，there are plenty of cattle and other livestock happily munching on feed in well-fenced pens，and the fields are filled with crops planted in neat rows.
幾個(gè)月以后，那個(gè)傳教士又一次來(lái)到農(nóng)場(chǎng)，快看那，這里與上次相比簡(jiǎn)直是天壤之別。房屋重新修好了，條件也比以前好多了，成群的牛羊在歡快地吃著青草，地里的莊稼也整整齊齊的排列著。
"Amazing!” the preacher says. "Look what God and you have accomplished together!"
“太神奇了”，傳教士驚呼道:“看那，上帝和你一起實(shí)現(xiàn)了你的夢(mèng)想!”
"Yes, reverend,” says the farmer, "but remember what the farm was like when God was working it alone!"
“沒(méi)錯(cuò)，教士，”那個(gè)農(nóng)民說(shuō)道:“可你也要記住當(dāng)初這個(gè)農(nóng)場(chǎng)只由上帝一人支配的時(shí)候是個(gè)什么樣子!”
簡(jiǎn)單容易的英語(yǔ)短笑話(huà)篇3
The dean of Engineering had once walked into a class, and said "Good Morning.”
一天工程系的主任走進(jìn)一個(gè)班，說(shuō)道:“早上好。”
The whole class chorused" Good Morning”
全班齊聲回復(fù):“早上好。”
"Hi，you are freshmen aren’t you?" he asked.
“你們是大一的吧?”主任問(wèn)道。
One student bolder than the others asked him how he knew.
一個(gè)膽子比較大的同學(xué)問(wèn)主任是怎么知道的。
"Well，”he said. "When I say‘Good Morning' to a class，if they are freshmen they say Good Morning' too. If they are sophomores，they quietly fold their papers away，and look at me. A class of juniors will look at me over the top of their papers, and then get back to them. A class of seniors will ignore my greeting, and keep reading the papers. When I say `Good Morning' to a class of graduate students, they write it down.”
“嗯，”主任說(shuō)，“如果是大一的新生，當(dāng)我向他們問(wèn)早上好的時(shí)候，他們也一定會(huì)說(shuō)‘早上好’的。如果他們是大二的學(xué)生，他們會(huì)輕輕地合上課本，然后集體望著我。大三的學(xué)生則會(huì)從書(shū)本上抬起頭看我一眼，然后馬上又繼續(xù)讀書(shū)了。大四的學(xué)生則會(huì)對(duì)我視而不見(jiàn)，繼續(xù)看書(shū)。至于研究生班的學(xué)生，我向他們問(wèn)早上好，他們就會(huì)把這句話(huà)寫(xiě)在筆記上。”
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