英語(yǔ)笑話爆笑超級(jí)搞笑的
下面是學(xué)習(xí)啦小編整理的一些關(guān)于there be在英語(yǔ)中的特殊用法, 希望大家喜歡。
英語(yǔ)爆笑笑話一:三人同舟
Three men were sitting on a park bench. The one in the middle was reading a newspaper; the others were pretending to fish. They baited imaginary hooks, cast lines and reeled in their catch.
A passing policeman stopped to watch the spectacle and asked the man in the middle if he knew the other two.
"Oh yes, " he said. "They are my friends.
"In that case, " warned the officer, "you'd better get them out of here!"
"Yes, sir, " the man replied, and he began rowing furiously.
三位男子在公園的長(zhǎng)椅上坐著。中間的一個(gè)在讀報(bào)紙,另外兩個(gè)在假裝釣魚。他們給想象的魚鉤上魚餌,放線,并卷線把魚抓上來(lái)。
一位過(guò)路警察駐足觀察了這個(gè)景象,他問(wèn)中間的那個(gè)男子是否認(rèn)識(shí)其他兩位。
“喔,認(rèn)識(shí),”他說(shuō),“他們是我的朋友。”
“那樣的話,”警察告誡說(shuō),“你最好把他們從這里弄走。”
“好的,警官。”那男子回答說(shuō),接著就開(kāi)始瘋狂般地做起劃槳的動(dòng)作來(lái)。
英語(yǔ)爆笑笑話二:As If Awakening From A Dream
A competition which subject is on giving up drinking is proceeding. One of lecturers says excitedly, " Alcohol can break down conjugal(婚姻的) relation, even cause your wife to leave you… "
A man shouts out at the news, "Give me another bottle of Brandy."
以戒酒為主題的演講比賽正在進(jìn)行,一個(gè)演講者動(dòng)情地說(shuō):“酒精可以破壞夫妻關(guān)系,甚至導(dǎo)致妻子離開(kāi)自己的丈夫……”
這時(shí)一個(gè)男人大聲喊:“再來(lái)一瓶白蘭地!”
英語(yǔ)爆笑笑話三:離婚
A husband and wife,both 91,stood before a judge,asking for a divorce."I don't understand,"He said,"Why do you want a divorce at this time of life?"
the husband explained "Well , you see,We wanted to wait until the children died."
有一個(gè)丈夫和妻子都是91歲,他們站在法官面前,要求離婚。“我不明白,”法官說(shuō),“你們?yōu)槭裁吹搅诉@把年紀(jì)還要離婚?”
丈夫解釋道:“嗯,你是知道的,我們以前是喲等到孩子們都死了。”
英語(yǔ)爆笑笑話四:I do not recognize you
Walking on the beach one day he saw a crab1, went to see what happens, suddenly crab pincers(鉗子) folder2, then crab bush run. Tiger jumped the pain, followed by the recovery of crabs3!
Catch up with no trees on the crab, and then to see a tiger in Shou Network spiders, tiger angry at Spider: Good you a crab! Do you think you posted on the Web and I do not recognize you!
一天老虎在沙灘散步,見(jiàn)到一只螃蟹,就走過(guò)去想看個(gè)究竟,突然被螃蟹的鉗子夾了一下,螃蟹拔腿就往樹(shù)叢里跑。老虎痛得跳起來(lái)了,緊接著就追螃蟹!
追到樹(shù)叢就不見(jiàn)螃蟹了,這時(shí)老虎看見(jiàn)一只守在大網(wǎng)中的蜘蛛,老虎對(duì)著蜘蛛發(fā)火了:好你個(gè)螃蟹!你以為你上了網(wǎng)我就不認(rèn)得你了!
英語(yǔ)爆笑笑話五:A Smart Parrot 聰明的鸚鵡
A curious guy goes to a pet shop to buy a parrot. There he sees a parrot with a red string tied to its left leg and a green string tied to it's right leg. He asks the owner the significance of the strings1. "Well, this is a highly trained parrot. If you pull the red string he speaks French; if you pull the green string he speaks German," replies the shop keeper.
"And what happens if I pull both the strings?" our curious shopper inquires.
"I fall off my perch2 you fool!!" screeches3 the parrot.
有個(gè)人去寵物店買鸚鵡。在那里,他看見(jiàn)有只鸚鵡的左腿被紅線系住,右腿則被綠線系住。對(duì)此他感到不解,于是他問(wèn)該店的老板,老板回答說(shuō):“這只鸚鵡受過(guò)特殊的訓(xùn)練。如果拉紅線,它就講法語(yǔ),拉綠線,它則講德語(yǔ)。”
這個(gè)好奇的人接著問(wèn),“要是我兩條線都拉,會(huì)怎么樣呢?”
“我就會(huì)掉下來(lái)了,你這個(gè)傻瓜!!”鸚鵡尖叫著說(shuō)。