2分鐘英語(yǔ)笑話短文閱讀
近年來(lái),冷笑話作為一種新興的語(yǔ)言現(xiàn)象在網(wǎng)絡(luò)、雜志上十分盛行。本文是2分鐘英語(yǔ)笑話短文，希望對(duì)大家有幫助!
2分鐘英語(yǔ)笑話短文：說(shuō)些悲哀的敬事
Bill,Jim,and Scott were at a convention together
比爾，吉姆，和史考特一起參加一場(chǎng)會(huì)議，
and were sharing a large suite on the top of a 75story sky-scraper.
并且在一棟七十五層摩天大樓的頂樓合住一間大套房.
After a long day of meetings
在一整天的會(huì)議之后，
they were shocked to hear that the elevators in their hotel were broken
他們非常驚訝地聽說(shuō)他們飯店的電梯壞掉了，
and they would have to climb 75 flights stairs to get to their room.
他們必須要爬七十五層的一樓梯回到他們的房間。
Bill said to Jim and Scott,
比爾對(duì)吉姆和史考特說(shuō)，
Let's break the monotony of this unpleasant task by concentrating on something interesting .
讓我們把精神集中在有趣的事情上，來(lái)打發(fā)這件令人不爽快又單調(diào) 乏味的苦差事。
I will tell jokes for 25 flights,
前二十五層我來(lái)說(shuō)笑話，
and Jim can sing songs for 25 flights ,
后二十五層吉姆可 以唱歌，
and Scott can tell sad stories the rest of the way.
剩下的路程史考特可以說(shuō)些悲哀的故事。
At the 26th floor bill stopped telling jockes and Jim began to sing,
到了二十六層 ，比爾停止說(shuō)笑話，吉姆開始唱歌。
At the 51st floor Jim stopped singing and Scott began to tell sad stories.
到了五十一層，吉姆停止唱歌，史考特開始說(shuō)些悲哀的敬事。
"I will tell my saddest story first," he said. "I left the room key in the car!"
他說(shuō)：“首先 ，我要說(shuō)我最悲哀的故事，我把房間鑰匙留在車子里面了!”
2分鐘英語(yǔ)笑話短文：剛才哪一位要干凈的杯子的
joe and fred were helping to build a house in a village. the weather was very warm, there was a lot of dust everywhere, and by half past twelve, they were very thirsty, so they stopped work to have their lunch. they found the nearest small bar, went in and sat down with their sandwiches.
喬和佛瑞德在一個(gè)村子里幫忙蓋一間房子。天氣很暖和，到處都有許多灰塵。12點(diǎn)半的時(shí)候，他們覺(jué)得非?？诳剩阃Ｏ聛?lái)去吃午飯了。他們找到最近的一家酒吧，走進(jìn)去坐下吃他們的三明治。
good afternoon, gentlemen. what can i get you? the man behind the bar asked.
下午好，先生。你們想要點(diǎn)什么?柜臺(tái)后面的伺應(yīng)問(wèn)道。
joe looked at fred and said, beer, i think. yes, a pint of beer each. is that all right for you, fred?
喬看了看佛瑞德說(shuō)：我想，啤酒吧。好，那就每人一品脫啤酒。這樣可以嗎，佛瑞德?
yes, that's all right. fred said. then he turned to the man behind the bar and said, and i want it in a clean glass! don't forget that.
好的，可以。佛瑞德說(shuō)。然后他轉(zhuǎn)過(guò)去跟柜臺(tái)后面的侍應(yīng)說(shuō)：我要啤酒裝在一個(gè)干凈的杯子里!別忘了。
the man behind the bar filled the glasses and brought them to joe and fred. then he said. which of you asked for the clean glass?
柜臺(tái)后面的侍應(yīng)倒?jié)M杯子后，拿給喬和佛瑞德，接著說(shuō)：剛才哪一位要干凈的杯子的?
2分鐘英語(yǔ)笑話短文：愿上帝與你一起實(shí)現(xiàn)你的夢(mèng)想
farmer purchases an old, run-down, abandoned farm with plans to turn it into a thriving enterprise. The fields are grown over with weeds, the farmhouse is falling apart, and the fences are collapsing all around.
During his first day of work, the town preacher stops by to bless the man's work, saying, May you and God work together to make this the farm of your dreams!
A few months later, the preacher stops by again to call on the farmer. Look and behold. It's like a completely different place -- the farmhouse is completely rebuilt and in excellent condition, there are plenty of cattle and other livestock happily munching on feed in well-fenced pens, and the fields are filled with crops planted in neat rows. Amazing! the preacher says. Look what God and you have accomplished together!
Yes, reverend, says the farmer, but remember what the farm was like when God was working it alone!
一個(gè)農(nóng)民買了一塊破舊、荒廢的農(nóng)場(chǎng)，他計(jì)劃著把農(nóng)場(chǎng)改造成一座欣欣向榮的園林。農(nóng)場(chǎng)目前的狀況是雜草遍布，房屋破舊不堪，四周的籬笆也東倒西歪。
在他著手改造的第一天，一個(gè)城里的傳教士停下來(lái)祝福他：愿上帝與你一起實(shí)現(xiàn)你的夢(mèng)想!
過(guò)了幾個(gè)月，那個(gè)傳教士又一次來(lái)拜訪農(nóng)民。駐足觀看，這里發(fā)生了天翻地覆的變化：房屋重新被整修過(guò)，條件也優(yōu)于從前，成群的牛羊正在歡快地吃著青草，地里的莊稼也成排地生長(zhǎng)著。太不可思議了，傳教士驚呼道，看啊，上帝和你一起實(shí)現(xiàn)了你的夢(mèng)想!
是的，教士，那個(gè)農(nóng)民說(shuō)道：可你別忘了，當(dāng)初這個(gè)農(nóng)場(chǎng)只由上帝一人管理時(shí)是個(gè)什么樣子!
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