大學(xué)經(jīng)典英語笑話閱讀
大學(xué)經(jīng)典英語笑話閱讀
笑話是民族文化不可或缺的一部分。透過笑話我們可以看到一個民族的生存環(huán)境、生活方式、社會關(guān)系和心理特征等等。本文是大學(xué)經(jīng)典英語笑話，希望對大家有幫助!
大學(xué)經(jīng)典英語笑話：一個雞蛋
An egg cup of tea to the tea, the results it becomes boiled eggs; have an egg run the Songhua River to swim, the results it becomes egg; have a go with eggs in Shandong, the results become Lu (halogen) eggs; an egg on the homeless, it becomes a wild eggs; there an egg accidentally fell on the road for a cross fell to the ground, turned into a missile; have an egg go to the family yard, and the results into the atomic bomb; have an egg go to the Tibetan Plateau, the results become a hydrogen bomb; an egg on the sick, the results become bad; have an egg married, turned into a jerk; have an egg go to the river swim, the results become a nuclear bomb; have an egg go to the flowers gone, turned into a Hua Dan; have an egg riding a horse, holding a knife, that he is a Peking Opera Blues; have an egg is the mother , the length of the ugly, the result becomes a dinosaur egg; have an egg is male, his wife and the other eggs out adultery, and he became a son of a bitch ... ...
一個雞蛋去茶館喝茶，結(jié)果它變成了茶葉蛋;有一個雞蛋跑去松花江游泳，結(jié)果它變成了松花蛋;有一有個雞蛋跑到了山東，結(jié)果變成了魯(鹵)蛋;有一個雞蛋無家可歸，結(jié)果它變成了野雞蛋;有一個雞蛋在路上不小心摔了一交，倒在地上，結(jié)果變成了導(dǎo)彈;有一 個雞蛋跑到人家院子里去了，結(jié)果變成了原子彈;有一個雞蛋跑到青藏高原，結(jié)果變成了氫彈;有一個雞蛋生病了，結(jié)果變成了壞蛋;有一個雞蛋嫁人了，結(jié)果變成了混蛋;有一個雞蛋跑到河里游泳，結(jié)果變成了核彈;有一個雞蛋跑到花叢中去了，結(jié)果變成了花旦;有一個 雞蛋騎著一匹馬，拿著一把刀，原來他是刀馬旦;有一個雞蛋是母的，長的很丑，結(jié)果就變成了恐龍蛋;有一個雞蛋是公的，他老婆在外面和別的雞蛋通奸，結(jié)果他變成了王八蛋……
大學(xué)經(jīng)典英語笑話：郵遞員
A man walked into a doctor's examining room
一個人走進一家診所。
A:Put out your tongue.
伸出你的舌頭。
B:OK.
好的。
Then he put out his tongue and the doctor looked at it quickly.
于是他伸出舌頭，醫(yī)生很快地看了一下。
A:You can put your tongue back now. It's clear what's wrong with you.You need more exercise.
好吧，把舌頭伸回去吧，你的病因很明顯，你需要更多的運動。
B:But，doctor, I don't think...
但是，醫(yī)生，我不認為……
A:Don't tell me what you think，I am the doctor，not you，I know what you need.I see hundreds of people like you.None of them get any exercis e.They sit in offices all day and in front of the television in the evening.What you need is to walk quickly for at least twenty mi-nutes a day.
不要告訴我你認為怎么樣，我是醫(yī)生，不是你。我知道你需要什么。我看過數(shù)以百計像你這樣的病人。他們沒有一個人鍛煉過。他們整天坐在辦公室里，晚上就坐在電視機前。你所需要的就是每天至少快跑20分鐘。
B:Doctor.you don't understand.I...
醫(yī)生，你不知道，我……
A:I don't want to hear any excuses. You must find time for exercise.If you don't，you will get fat and have health problems when you are o1der.
我不想聽任何理由。你應(yīng)該抽出時間來運動，如果你不鍛煉，那么當(dāng)你老的時候，你就會變得很胖，并且有健康問題。
B:But I walk everyday.
但我每天都走路的。
A:Oh，yes，and I know what kind of walking that is. You walk a few feet from your home to the station，and a few more feet from the sta- lion to your office，and a few more feet fr om your office to a restaurant for much and back. That's not real walking. I'm talking about a walk in the park for twenty minutes every day.
喔，是的。我知道那是一種怎樣的散步，你走幾英尺的路，從家到火車站，又走幾英尺從車站到辦公室，然后走幾英尺從辦公室到餐館中吃中飯再回來。那不是真正的散步。我所說的是每天在公園中散步20分鐘。
B:(Shouting)Will you listen to me. doctor t I am a mailman and I walk for seven hour every day.
(叫喊著)請聽我說，醫(yī)生!我是一名郵遞員，我每天得走7小時的路。
A:(Being silent for a moment) Put your tongue out again，will you?
(悶在那里半天不語)再把你的舌頭伸出來，行嗎?
大學(xué)經(jīng)典英語笑話：A Good Boy
Little Robert asked his mother for two cents. "What did you do with the money I gave you yesterday?"
"I gave it to a poor old woman," he answered.
"You're a good boy," said the mother proudly. "Here are two cents more. But why are you so interested in the old woman?"
"She is the one who sells the candy."
好孩子
小羅伯特向媽媽要兩分錢。
“昨天給你的錢干什么了?”
“我給了一個可憐的老太婆，”他回答說。 “你真是個好孩子，”媽媽驕傲地說。“再給你兩分錢?？赡銥槭裁磳δ俏焕咸敲锤信d趣呢?”
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