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學(xué)習(xí)啦 > 學(xué)習(xí)英語 > 英語閱讀 > 英語笑話 > 關(guān)于經(jīng)典英語短笑話閱讀

關(guān)于經(jīng)典英語短笑話閱讀

時間: 韋彥867 分享

關(guān)于經(jīng)典英語短笑話閱讀

  笑話是文化的重要組成部分,通過笑話,我們可以了解一個國家的文化內(nèi)涵。學(xué)習(xí)啦小編整理了關(guān)于經(jīng)典英語短笑話,歡迎閱讀!

  關(guān)于經(jīng)典英語短笑話:I'd Rather Have A Puppy

  A little boy and his dad were walking down the street whan they saw two dogs having sex. The little boy asks his father 揇addy, what are they doing??The father says, 揗aking a puppy.?So they walk on and go home.

  A few days later, the little boy walks in on his parents having sex. The little boy says, 揇addy, what are you doing??The father replies, aking a baby.?The little boy says, 揥ell, flip her around! I'd rather have a puppy instead!?

  關(guān)于經(jīng)典英語短笑話:He's going to be...

  One day, while the boy was away at school, his father decided to try an experiment. What he did was, he went into the boy's room and placed on his study table these three objects: A Bible, a silver dollar, and a bottle of whiskey.

  "Now then," the old preacher said to himself, "I'll just hide behind the door here, and when my son comes home from school this afternoon, I'll see which of these three objects he picks up. If he picks up the Bible, he's going to be a preacher like me, and what a blessing that would be.

  If he picks up the dollar, he's going to be a businessman, and that would be o.k. too.

  But if he picks up the bottle, he's going to be a drunkard - a no-good drunkard and Lord, what a shame that would be."

  The old man was anxious as he waited, and soon he heard his son's footsteps as he came into the house whistling and headed back to his room. He deposited his books on the bed, as a matter of routine, and as he turned around to leave the room he spotted the objects on the table. With a curious set in his eye, he walked over to inspect them. What he finally did was, he picked up the Bible and placed it under his arm. He picked up the silver dollar and dropped it into his pocket. He uncorked the bottle and took a big drink...

  "Lord have mercy," the old man whispered, "He's gonna be a politician

  關(guān)于經(jīng)典英語短笑話: Blonde In Space Rocket

  The NASA is launching a rocket to the moon. On board there are two pigs and Kiki, a stunningblond.

  When the rocket is outside the stratosphere, the first stage drops off. Contact is made: "Houston here, Pig 1, Pig 1, do you read us, over."

  "Oink, oink, here Pig1, read you loud and clear"

  "Pig 1, do you still know your instructions?"

  "Yes, when we get to the moon, I press the red button to initiate the moon landing, over."

  "That's right. Over and out."

  They go on until the rocket separates its booster stage. "Hallo, Pig2, Here Houston, come in please."

  "Oink, oink, here Pig 2, read you loud and clear."

  "OK, Pig 2 do you remember your instructions?"

  "Yes, when we've landed on the moon and are ready to leave, I press on the green button to initiate the launch program."

  "That's right. Over and out."

  An hour later when the rocket has achieved the correct speed the last stage drops off as planned. Ground control contacts the astronauts again.

  "Houston here, Kiki, come in, Kiki do you read us?"

  "Kiki here, reading you loud and clear"

  "Kiki, do you remeber your instructions?"

  "Yes," Kiki says, "I feed the two pigs and keep my hands off any buttons."

  關(guān)于經(jīng)典英語短笑話:The River

  A preacher was completing a temperance sermon: with great expression he said, "If I had all the beer in the world, I'd take it and throw it into the river."

  With even greater emphasis he said, "And if I had all the wine in the world, I'd take it and throw it into the river."

  And then finally, he said, "And if I had all the whiskey in the world, I'd take it and throw it into the river." He sat down.

  The song leader then stood very cautiously and announced with a smile, "For our closing song, let us sing Hymn number 365: "Shall We Gather at the River."

  關(guān)于經(jīng)典英語短笑話:Beer, eh?

  A Canadian is walking down the street with a case of beer under his arm. His friend Doug stops him and asks, "Hey Bob! Whacha get the case of beer for?"

  "I got it for my wife, eh." answers Bob.

  "Oh!" exclaims Doug, "Good trade."

  
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