關(guān)于2分鐘初中英語(yǔ)笑話
關(guān)于2分鐘初中英語(yǔ)笑話
冷笑話是一種新興的語(yǔ)言現(xiàn)象,伴隨著網(wǎng)絡(luò)的普及它已經(jīng)滲透到了青年群體的日常生活,偶爾爆出的一兩句冷笑話能使交流氛圍變得輕松愉悅,也能展示交談?wù)叩挠哪椭腔?。學(xué)習(xí)啦小編分享關(guān)于2分鐘初中英語(yǔ)笑話，希望可以幫助大家!
關(guān)于2分鐘初中英語(yǔ)笑話：Dumas(仲馬)
One day a man was taunting Alexandre Dumas，the greatFrench novelist，with hisancestry.
“Why，” snarled the fellow，“you are a quadroon;yourfather was a mulatto，and your grandfather was a negro.”
“Yes，” roared Dumas，“and，if you wish to know'mygreatgrandfather was a monkey. In fact， my pedigree beganwhere yours terminates.”
56.仲馬
有一天，一個(gè)人在嘲弄法國(guó)大小說(shuō)家亞歷山大·仲馬，譏笑他的祖先。
那家伙厲聲說(shuō)：“唔，你是四分之一黑白混血兒，你父親是黑白混血兒，而你的祖父是個(gè)黑人。”
“是的，”仲馬大聲回敬：“還有呢，如果你想知道的話， 我的曾祖父是一只猴子。其實(shí)我的血統(tǒng)起始于你的血統(tǒng)終止的地方。”
關(guān)于2分鐘初中英語(yǔ)笑話：A Life for a Life(以“命”抵命)
The English author，Richard Savage，was once living inLondon in great poverty.In order to earn a little money he hadwritten the story of his life，but not many copies of the bookhad been sold in the shops，and Savage was living from hand tomouth.As a result of his lack of food he became very ill，butafter a time，owing to the skill of the doctor who had lookedafter him，he got well again.After a week or two the doctorsent a bill to Savage for his visits， but poor Savage hadn't anymoney and couldn't pay it.The doctor waited for another month and sent the bill again. But still no money came. Afterseveral weeks he sent it to him again asking for his money.Inthe end he came to Savage's house and asked him for payment，saying to Savage，“You know you owe your life to me and Iexpected some gratitude from you.”
“I agree，” said Savage，“that I owe my life to you， and toprove to you that I am not ungrateful for your work I will givemy life to you.”With these words he handed to him two volumes entitled，The life of Richard Savage.
英國(guó)作家理查德·薩維奇一度在倫敦過(guò)著貧困潦倒的生活，為了賺幾個(gè)錢，他曾寫了有關(guān)他自己生平的故事。但是這部書在書店里并沒(méi)有賣出幾本，薩維奇過(guò)著朝不保夕的日子。由于缺乏食物，他病得很厲害。后來(lái)，由于給他治療的那個(gè)醫(yī)生的高明醫(yī)術(shù)，他才又恢復(fù)了健康。過(guò)了一兩個(gè)星期之后，醫(yī)生給薩維奇送來(lái)了一張討要診費(fèi)的帳單，但是貧窮的薩維奇沒(méi)有錢來(lái)償付。醫(yī)生等了一個(gè)月后又送來(lái)了帳單，但仍然未索回分文。幾個(gè)星期之后，他又送來(lái)帳單要錢。最后，醫(yī)生本人來(lái)到了薩維奇的家中，對(duì)他說(shuō)：“你明白，你是欠我一條命的，我希望你有所報(bào)答。”
“是的，”薩維奇說(shuō)，“我是欠你一條命，為了向你證明我對(duì)你的診治不是不報(bào)答，我將把我的命給你。”
說(shuō)著這番話，薩維奇遞給醫(yī)生兩卷書，名叫《理查德·薩維奇的一生》。
關(guān)于2分鐘初中英語(yǔ)笑話：Horne Tooke(霍恩·圖克)
George Ⅲ asked the once wellknown wit， Horne Tooke，whether he could play cards.
“Your Majesty，” replied Tooke，“ I am a mere childwhere cards are concerned. I cannot even tell a King from aKnave.”
喬治三世問(wèn)一度大名鼎鼎的才子霍恩·圖克，會(huì)不會(huì)玩紙牌。
“陛下，”圖克回答說(shuō)：“在玩紙牌方面，我只不過(guò)是幼兒園的水平。我甚至分不清國(guó)王和無(wú)賴。”
關(guān)于2分鐘初中英語(yǔ)笑話：Bishop Creighton(克萊頓主教)
Creighton was going along a West End square when hesaw a little fellow trying to reach the knocker of a large house.
“Can't you reach up so high?”queried the Bishop kindly.
“No， sir，” said the small youngster.
“Well， then， let me help you，” and the Bishop mountedthe three steps and gave a splendid rattat.
The little boy glanced hastily at the gentleman of the cloth.“Come on，” he yelled，“we must boaf run nar.”
當(dāng)克萊頓主教沿著倫敦西區(qū)的一個(gè)廣場(chǎng)走著的時(shí)候，他 看見(jiàn)一個(gè)小家伙正試圖抓住一所大房子的門環(huán)。
“你是不是夠不到這么高的地方呢?”主教好意地問(wèn)。
“是的，先生。”那小孩說(shuō)。
“那好，讓我來(lái)幫你。”主教登上那三級(jí)臺(tái)階，在門上重重扣了幾下。
那個(gè)小男孩急忙給教士遞上一個(gè)眼色。“快跑，”他喊著：“我們倆都得跑。”
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