中篇好笑的英語笑話大全
中篇好笑的英語笑話大全
作為人類所特有的天賦，幽默被認(rèn)為是日常會話中一種最寶貴的語言形式。長期以來，幽默因其在人際交往中的神奇效果，已經(jīng)成為研究者們普遍關(guān)心的話題。本文是中篇好笑的英語笑話，希望對大家有幫助!
中篇好笑的英語笑話篇一
Humor Impaired Preacher
A preacher, who was "humor impaired," attended a conference to help encourage and better equip pastors(牧師) for their ministry.
Among the speakers were many well known and dynamic speakers(電動揚聲器) . One such boldly approached the pulpit(講道臺) and, gathering the entire crowd's attention, said, "The best years of my life were spent in the arms of a woman that wasn't my wife!"
The crowd was shocked!
He followed up by saying, "And that woman was my mother!" - The crowd burst into laughter and delivered the rest of his talk, which went over quite well.
The next week, our pastor decided he'd give this humor thing a try, and use that joke in his sermon(布道，訓(xùn)誡) . As he approached the pulpit that Sunday, he tried to rehearse(排練) the joke in his head. It suddenly seemed a bit foggy to him.
Getting to the microphone he said loudly, "The greatest years of my life were spent in the arms of a woman that was not my wife!"
The congregation(集會，圣會) inhaled in surprise. After standing there for almost 10 seconds in the stunned(受驚的) silence, trying to recall the second half of the joke, the pastor finally blurted out, "...and I can't remember who she was!"
中篇好笑的英語笑話篇二
Snorer 瞌睡者
The preacher was vexed(生氣的) because a certain member of his congregation(集會，圣會) always fell asleep during the sermon.
As the man was snoring in the front row one Sunday, the preacher determined he would teach him not to sleep during the sermon. So, in a whisper, he asked the congregation. "All who want to go to heaven, please rise." Everyone got up except the snorer. After whispering "Be seated", the minister shouted at the top of his voiced, "All those who want to be with the devil, please rise."
Awaking with a start(嚇一跳) , the sleepy-head jumped to his feet and saw the preacherstanding tall and angry in the pulpit(講道壇) , "Well, sir," he said, "I don't know what we're voting on, but it looks like you and me are the only ones for it."
牧師非常生氣，因為總有一個人在他說教時打瞌睡。
一個星期天，正當(dāng)坐在前排的那個人又在瞌睡時，牧師決定要好好教育他一下，讓他不要再在布道時睡覺。于是他低聲對信徒們說：“想去天堂的人，都請站起來吧。”所有的人都站了起來——當(dāng)然，除了那個打瞌睡的人。在低聲說過請坐后，牧師高聲喊道：“想去下地獄的人請站起來!”
打瞌睡的人被這突然的喊叫聲驚醒了，他站了起來?？吹侥翈煾哒驹诮虊希鷼獾目粗?。這個人說道：“噢，先生，我不知道我們在選什么，但看上去只有你和我是候選人。”
中篇好笑的英語笑話篇三
Gay Man Meets Saint Peter
Once, a gay man went to heaven. At the Great Gate, Saint Peter was waiting for him. After rewieving his records Saint Pete decided to let him in. "Follow me" he said, opening the gate and walking in.
After some walk, Saint Pete's keys accidentally fell on the ground. Unaware, he bent over to pick up the keys. That was something the gay man just couldn't resist, so he jumped on him and did his thing. Saint Pete was furious. "If you do that again, You'll go straight to hell! But follow me, we're almost there."
After some more walk, Pete dropped his keys again, and again, the gay man jumped on him. Saint Pete was even more furious than before, but decided to give the gay guy one last chance.
Again they walk and for the third time Pete drops his keys, so he bends over and picks them up. The gay guy, having no self control jumps on him. Pete is now fed up and sends the gay guy straight to hell.
A few weeks later, Saint Pete goes down to hell for his routine inspection, but this time something is wrong, it is freezing, no fire, no lava and in one corner, he finds the devil lying under a stack of blankets freezing his ass of.
"Why is it so god damn cold down here? "Pete asks.
"Well you just try bending down for firewood!!" The devil replied.
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