有關(guān)好笑的英語(yǔ)笑話(huà)精選
有關(guān)好笑的英語(yǔ)笑話(huà)精選
冷笑話(huà)是近幾年出現(xiàn)的一個(gè)新詞,也是一種出現(xiàn)在我們身邊的不可忽視的新的語(yǔ)言現(xiàn)象,它具有強(qiáng)大的生命力,一時(shí)間大紅大紫,廣泛流行于互聯(lián)網(wǎng)、論壇、博客、電子郵件、電視綜藝節(jié)目、喜劇電影、書(shū)籍、雜志等媒體中。本文是有關(guān)好笑的英語(yǔ)笑話(huà),希望對(duì)大家有幫助!
有關(guān)好笑的英語(yǔ)笑話(huà)篇一
The Time
BLONDE: Excuse me, what time is it right now?
WOMAN: It's 11:25 PM.
BLONDE: (confused look on face) You know, it's the weirdest1 thing, I've asked that question thirty times today, and every time someone gives me a different answer.
有關(guān)好笑的英語(yǔ)笑話(huà)篇二
Boyfriend Upgrade
Dear Tech Support,
Last year I upgraded from Boyfriend 5.0 to Husband 1.0 and noticed that the new program began making unexpected changes to the accounting modules, limiting access to flower and jewelry applications that had operated flawlessly under Boyfriend 5.0.
In addition, Husband 1.0 uninstalled many other valuable programs, such as Romance 9.9 but installed undesirable programs such as NFL 5.0 and NBA 3.0.
Conversation 8.0 no longer runs and HouseCleaning 2.6 simply crashes the system. I've tried running Nagging 5.3 to fix these problems, but to no avail.
Desperate
Dear Desperate,
Keep in mind that Boyfriend 5.0 is an entertainment package, while Husband 1.0 is an operating system.
Try to enter the command: "C:/ I THOUGHT YOU LOVEDME" and install Tears 6.2. Husband 1.0 should then automatically run the applications: Guilty 3.0 and Flowers 7.0.
But remember, over use can cause Husband 1.0 to default to GrumpySilence 2.5, HappyHour 7.0 or Beer 6.1.
Beer 6.1 is a very bad program that will create "Snoring Loudly" wavefiles.
DO NOT install MotherInLaw 1.0 or reinstall another Boyfriend program. These are not supported applications and will crash Husband 1.0.
In summary, Husband 1.0 is a great program, but it does have limited memory and cannot learn new applications quickly. Consider buying additional software to improve performance.
I personally recommend HotFood 3.0 and Lingerie 5.3
Tech Support
有關(guān)好笑的英語(yǔ)笑話(huà)篇三
"I no longer looker look like an old lady," said Sophia to her husband now busy solving a cross-word puzzle by the fire.
She had just been to her hairdresser and looked quite a different person.
The fellow lifted his head and muttered under his breath: "That's quite true, darling. You don't look like an old lady at all."
"And what do I look like?" insisted the lady blushing prettily.
"You look like an old gentleman."
“我看起來(lái)不再像個(gè)老太太了。”索菲亞對(duì)她正在火爐前玩填字游戲的丈夫說(shuō)。
她剛?cè)ミ^(guò)美發(fā)店,現(xiàn)在看起來(lái)完全像變了一個(gè)人。
那個(gè)老家伙抬起頭嘟囔著說(shuō):“一點(diǎn)兒不錯(cuò),親愛(ài)的。你看起來(lái)一點(diǎn)也不像個(gè)老婦人。”
“那我看起來(lái)像什么呢?”這位女士害羞地問(wèn)道。
“你看起來(lái)像個(gè)老紳士。”
有關(guān)好笑的英語(yǔ)笑話(huà)篇四
An ingenious idea 一個(gè)好辦法
A man told the doctor that his wife had lost her voice and asked what he could do about it.
The doctor said, "Try getting home late some night. It's good method."
有個(gè)人對(duì)醫(yī)生說(shuō)他的妻子不說(shuō)話(huà)了,問(wèn)他該怎么辦。
醫(yī)生說(shuō):“你試試哪天晚上很晚才回家吧。這是個(gè)好辦法。”
有關(guān)好笑的英語(yǔ)笑話(huà)篇五
No matter 沒(méi)關(guān)系
A well-dressed woman got on a bus. She handed a ten-dollar note to the drive and said: "Sorry, I have no nickels."
The driver took the note and said: "It doesn't matter, lady, You would soon get back 199 nickels."
一個(gè)穿著很考究的女人上了 一部公共汽車(chē)。她拿出一張10美元的鈔票給司機(jī),說(shuō):“對(duì)不起,我沒(méi)有硬幣。”
司機(jī)接過(guò)鈔票時(shí)說(shuō):“沒(méi)關(guān)系,太太,你很快就會(huì)取回199個(gè)硬幣的。”
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