英語小笑話
我國古代笑話是幾千年來人民群眾的口頭文學(xué)形式。這些笑話當(dāng)中,有的揭露了當(dāng)時(shí)社會(huì)的各種矛盾;有的反映了豐富多采的階級(jí)斗爭和生產(chǎn)斗爭生活。下面是學(xué)習(xí)啦小編帶來的英語幽默小故事，歡迎閱讀!
英語幽默小故事篇一
The visit to the doctor 拜訪醫(yī)師
A Man asked his doctor if he thought he'd live to be a hundred .
一個(gè)男人問他的醫(yī)師是否認(rèn)為他會(huì)活到一百歲。
The doctor asked the man ,"Do you smoke or drink ?"
醫(yī)師問這個(gè)男人：“你抽煙或喝酒嗎?”
" No ,"he replied , "I have never done either ."
他回答說：“不，我從不抽煙喝酒。”
" Do you gamble,drive fast cars ,and fool around with woman?" inquired the doctor .
醫(yī)師問說：“你賭博、開快車、玩女人嗎?”
"No,I have done any of those things either."
“不，我也從不干那些事情。”
"Well then," said the doctor ," what do you want to live to be a hundred for?"
醫(yī)師說：“那你干嗎要活到一百歲呀?”
英語幽默小故事篇二
All In the family 都在這一家
All In the family
都在這一家
Eight-year-old Sally brought her report card home from school .
八十歲大的 莎莉從學(xué)校把她的成績報(bào)告卡帶回家。
Her marks were good mostly .
她的成績不錯(cuò)，
A's and a couple of B'S .
大部分都是A，還有幾個(gè)B。
However ,her teacher had written across the bottom,
可是， 她韻老師在卡片下方寫道：
"SALLY is a smart little girl,but she has one fault,
“莎莉是個(gè)聰明的小女孩，但是她有一個(gè)毛病。
she talks too much in school.I have an idea I am going to try,
她在學(xué)校太愛講話。我有一個(gè)想法我要來試試看，
which I think may break her of the bad habit."
我認(rèn)為.這個(gè)想法可能會(huì)讓她改掉這個(gè)壞習(xí)慣。”
Sally's dad signed her report card,
莎莉的爸爸簽了她的學(xué)習(xí)報(bào)告卡，
putting a note on the back ,
并在卡片背面注記：
"Please let me know if your idea work on SALLY
“如果你的想法對(duì)莎莉很有效，請(qǐng)你讓我知道，
because I would like to try it out on her mother."
因?yàn)槲蚁胍阉囉迷谒龐寢屔砩稀?/p>
英語幽默小故事篇三
Gone Shopping 購物
Our supermarket had a sald on boneless chicken breasts,and a woman I know ontended tostock up .
我們的超級(jí)市，場在廉價(jià)拍賣無骨雞胸，我認(rèn)識(shí)的某位女士打算去多買一些。
At the store,However,she was disappointed to find only a few skimpy prepackaged portopnsof the poultry,
然而，到了這家肉店的時(shí)候她感到很失望，因?yàn)橹徽业揭稽c(diǎn)點(diǎn)事先就包裝好的雞肉，
so she complained to the butcher.
所以她就向這位肉店老板抱怨。
"don't worry,lady," he said.
他說：“小姐，別擔(dān)心，
"I will pack some more trays and have them ready for you by the time you finish shopping."
我會(huì)替你多包幾盤，在你買完東西的時(shí)候把它們準(zhǔn)備好。”
Several aisles later ,my friend heard the butcher's voice boom over th public-address system:
逛完幾個(gè)走道之后，我的朋友聽到肉店老板的聲音透過公共廣播系統(tǒng)隆隆地說
"Will the lady who wanted bigger breasts please meet me at the back of the store?"
“那位想要大胸部的小姐請(qǐng)到本店后方來見我好嗎?”
英語幽默小故事篇四
浪漫之旅 A romantic trip
A: Hey, good looking, wanna go on a romatic cruise?
A:親愛的，想不想來一場浪漫之旅
B: Who would book us on a cruise?
B:誰能幫我們預(yù)定這次巡航呢?
A: The U.S.S. ark
A:u.s.s方舟
英語幽默小故事篇五
Laboratory Tests 實(shí)驗(yàn)室檢查
Two children were sitting outside a clinic.
有兩個(gè)小孩子坐在一間診療室外面。
One of them was crying very loudly.
其中一個(gè)小孩子哭得非常犬聲。
2nd Child;Why are you crying?
第二位小孩子說：“你為什么哭呀?”
1st Child:I came here for blood test.
第一位小孩子說：“我來這里驗(yàn)血呀”
2nd Child：So?Are you afraid?
第二位小孩子說：“那又怎樣?你害怕呀?”
1st Child :No .Not that.For the blood test,they cut my finger.
第一位小孩子說：“不怕呀，又不是那樣啦。因?yàn)轵?yàn)血的話，他們要割我的手指頭啦。”
At this,the second one started crying.
一聽到這么說，第二位小孩子就開始哭了，
The first one was astonished.
第一位小孩子就非常驚訝。
1st Child :Why are you crying now?
第一位小孩子說：“你現(xiàn)在為什幺哭呀?”
2nd Child :I have come for my urine?test!
第二位小孩子說：“我來這里微尿液檢驗(yàn)的啦.!”
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