好笑學(xué)生英語(yǔ)笑話品析

　　幽默笑話在生活中幾乎無(wú)處不在,它給人們的生活增添了不少色彩。下面小編整理了學(xué)生英語(yǔ)笑話，希望大家喜歡!

　　學(xué)生英語(yǔ)笑話品析

　　是死是活(中英)

　　Genuine court transcript. . .

　　真實(shí)的法庭記錄……

　　Q: Doctor, before you performed the autopsy, did you check for a pulse?

　　問(wèn):在你解剖之前你有沒有檢查脈搏?

　　A: No.

　　答:沒有。

　　Q: Did you check for blood pressure?

　　問(wèn):你有沒有檢查血壓?

　　A: No.

　　答:沒有。

　　Q: Did you check for breathing?

　　問(wèn):你檢查呼吸情況了嗎?

　　A: No.

　　答:沒有。

　　Q: So, then it is possible that the patent was alive when you began the autopsy?

　　問(wèn):這么說(shuō)，病人也有可能在你開始解剖前還活著。

　　A: No.

　　答:沒有。

　　Q: How can you be so sure, Doctor?

　　問(wèn):你怎么這么確定，醫(yī)生?

　　A: Because his brain was sitting on my desk in a jar.

　　答:因?yàn)樗哪X子在我桌子上的一個(gè)瓶子里。

　　Q: But could the patient have still been alive nevertheless?

　　問(wèn):但是病人仍然有可能還活著嗎?

　　A: Yes，it is possible that he could have been ali

　　答:是的，他有可能還活著，并在某個(gè)地方正在審案子呢。

　　經(jīng)典的學(xué)生英語(yǔ)笑話

　　縣議員(中英)

　　An old couple was sitting down and the wife decided to strike up a conversation. She asked her husband, "Have you ever cheated on me? It is all over, so just tell me.”

　　一對(duì)老夫妻坐在一起時(shí)，妻子想和丈夫聊聊天就問(wèn):“你曾經(jīng)騙過(guò)我嗎?我們都這么大年紀(jì)了，告訴我吧。”

　　He answers: "No, and you.”

　　他回答:“沒有，那你呢?”

　　"Well, remember that time you got fired and then rehired? Well, I visited your boss.”

　　“哦，還記得那次你被解雇了，然后又被重新雇用了?那是因?yàn)槲胰フ伊四愕睦习濉?rdquo;

　　"Is that all?" he asks.

　　“就這么多嗎?”他問(wèn)。

　　"No, remember that time you wanted a raise and your boss refused. I talked to the head of the company in his bed.”

　　“還有，記得那次你提出要加薪，但是你的老板拒絕了。我和你的老板在他的床上談了這個(gè)問(wèn)題。”

　　"Please tell me that is all,” asks her husband.

　　“請(qǐng)不要告訴我你還有事情騙我了，”她的丈夫說(shuō)。

　　"No, do you remember when you ran for town legislator and you were 150 votes short?!”

　　“還有，你記得那次你克選縣議員，你開始的時(shí)候差了一百五十票?!”

　　關(guān)于學(xué)生英語(yǔ)笑話

　　郵箱(中英)

　　A blonde went outside to check her mailbox, and her neighbor kept an eye on her, she had no mail, so she went back inside her house. Two minutes later, the same blonde went outside for the 2nd time to check her mailbox, and still，she had no mail，and the neighbor was confused. One minute later, again the woman comes outside to check her mailbox for the 3rd time, and again，she had no mail. This time, her neighbor went up to her and said, "The mailman won’t be here for another 3 more hours, why do you keep on checking your mail" The blonde said, "Oh, because my computer keeps on saying, `You've got mail.”’

　　一個(gè)金發(fā)女郎走出門來(lái)檢查她的郵箱，她的鄰居看見了她。她沒有發(fā)現(xiàn)郵件，所以她就回到了家里。過(guò)了兩分鐘，這個(gè)金發(fā)女郎又出來(lái)第二次檢查她的郵箱，她仍然沒有發(fā)現(xiàn)郵件，她的鄰居看見了有些迷惑。一分鐘以后，這個(gè)女人又出來(lái)第三次檢查郵箱，她還是一無(wú)所獲。這回她的鄰居走向前去問(wèn)她:“郵遞員三個(gè)小時(shí)內(nèi)是不會(huì)來(lái)的。你為什么不斷的檢查你的郵箱呀?”那個(gè)金發(fā)女郎說(shuō):“噢，因?yàn)槲业碾娔X總是告訴我‘你有新郵件’。”