笑話是內(nèi)容豐富并具有出乎意料結(jié)尾的幽默口頭故事。笑話幾乎涵蓋人們生活的所有領(lǐng)域,其中包括政治笑話、經(jīng)濟笑話、家庭生活笑話、關(guān)于民族性格的笑話等。小編精心收集了簡短幽默雙人英語小短文，供大家欣賞學(xué)習(xí)!

　　簡短幽默雙人英語小短文篇1

　　A fat man and a skinny man were arguing about who was the more polite. 一個胖子和一個瘦子在爭論誰更有禮貌。

　　The skinny man said he was more polite because he always tipped his hat to ladies. 瘦子說他更有禮貌，因為他經(jīng)常對女士摘帽示意。

　　But the fat man knew he was more courteous because, whenever he got up and offered his seat, two ladies could sit down.但是胖子認為他更有風(fēng)度，因為無論什么時候他在車上給別人讓座時，總有兩位女士能坐下。

　　簡短幽默雙人英語小短文篇2

　　Working at the post office, I'm used to dealing with a moody public. So when one irate customer stormed my desk, I responded in my calmest voice, "What's the trouble?" "I went out this morning," she began, "and when I came home I found a card saying the mailman tried to deliver a package but no one was home. My husband was in all morning. He never heard a thing!" After apologizing, I got her parcel. "Oh, good," she gushed. "We've been waiting for this for ages." "What is it?" I asked. "My husband's new hearing aid."

　　我在郵局上班，對于顧客們的各種情緒早已習(xí)以為常了。所以，有一天當(dāng)一個生氣的顧客氣沖沖地來到我的工作臺時，我還是非常平靜地問她，“有什么問題嗎?”“我早上上街了，”女顧客說，“我回到家的時候，我看到一個卡片，卡片說郵遞員要給我們家送包裹，但沒人在家?？墒俏业恼煞蛘麄€早上都在家啊。他說他什么都沒聽到”。在表示了歉意之后，我把包裹給了她。“噢，太好了”，那位女顧客喜形于色。“我們等這東西都等多少年了!”“是什么好東西?”我問。“我丈夫的新助聽器”。

　　簡短幽默雙人英語小短文篇3

　　The fine-furniture store where I work has been in business since the 1920s. Recently I received a call from a woman who wanted to replace some chairs from a dining set purchased from us in the 1930s. I assured her we could help and sought the assistance of the office manager. "You'll never believe this one, " I told him." I just got a call from a customer who bought some chairs from us in the 1930s. " Before I could finish repeating her request, he interrupted and said, "Don't tell me she hasn't received them yet!"

　　我所工作的精品家具商店是從20世紀二十年代以來就營業(yè)的。最近我接到一個婦女的電話。她想換一套餐具中的一些椅子。這套餐具她是在三十年代從我們這兒買的。我向她保證說我們可以幫她的忙，于是我向部門經(jīng)理尋求幫助。“你永遠也不會相信，”我對他說，“我剛接到一個顧客的電話，她在三十年代從我們這里買了一些椅子。” 我還沒來得及說她的要求，經(jīng)理就打斷了我的話：“你別告訴我她到現(xiàn)在還沒收到貨!”

　　簡短幽默雙人英語小短文篇4

　　A husband and wife,both 91,stood before a judge,asking for a divorce."I don't understand,"He said,"Why do you want a divorce at this time of life?"the husband explained "Well , you see,We wanted to wait until the children died."

　　有一個丈夫和妻子都是91歲，他們站在法官面前，要求離婚。“我不明白，”法官說，“你們?yōu)槭裁吹搅诉@把年紀還要離婚?”丈夫解釋道：“嗯，你是知道的，我們以前是喲等到孩子們都死了。”

　　簡短幽默雙人英語小短文篇5

　　A little girl was talking to her teacher about whales.The teacher said it was physically1 impossible for a whale to swallow a human because even though it was a very large mammal its throat was very small.The little girl stated that a whale swallowed Jonah.Irritated, the teacher reiterated2 that a whale could not swallow a human; it was physically impossible.The little girl said, "When I get to heaven I will ask Jonah."The teacher asked, "What if Jonah went to hell?"The little girl replied, "Then you ask him."

　　一個小女孩和她的老師正在談?wù)撚嘘P(guān)鯨魚的事情。她的老師說：“一頭鯨魚從身體構(gòu)造的角度看，是不可能吞掉一個人的。因為盡管鯨魚是一種非常巨大的哺乳動物，可它的嗓子非常小。”那個小女孩說約拿(一位西伯來先知)就是被鯨魚吞掉的。她的老師非常生氣，她再次告訴小女孩說：“從身體構(gòu)造角度來講，鯨魚是不可能吞掉一個人的。”那個小女孩說：“那等我到了天堂，就去問問約拿。”她的老師問：“那么，假如約拿下了地獄怎么辦?”那個小女孩回答：“如果是那樣的話，你就去問他。”

　　
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