TED演講:二十歲是不可以揮霍的光陰
下面學(xué)習(xí)啦小編給大家分享TED演講:二十歲是不可以揮霍的光陰,歡迎閱讀:
TED演講:二十歲是不可以揮霍的光陰
5天內(nèi)超過60萬次瀏覽量的最新TED演講“二十歲一去不再來”激起了世界各地的熱烈討論,資深心理治療師 Meg Jay分享給20多歲青年人的人生建議:(1)不要為你究竟是誰而煩惱,去賺那些說明你是誰的資本。(2)不要把自己封鎖在小圈子里。(3)記住你可以選擇自己的家庭。
Meg說:“第一,我常告訴二十多歲的男孩女孩,不要為你究竟是誰而煩惱,開始思考你可以是誰,并且去賺那些說明你是誰的資本。現(xiàn)在就是最好的嘗試時機,不管是海外實習(xí),還是創(chuàng)業(yè),或者做公益。第二,年輕人經(jīng)常聚在一起,感情好到可以穿一條褲子。可是社會中許多機會是從遠關(guān)系開始的,不要把自己封鎖在小圈子里,走出去你才會對自己的經(jīng)歷有更多的認識。第三,記住你可以選擇自己的家庭。你的婚姻就是未來幾十年的家庭,就算你要到三十歲結(jié)婚,現(xiàn)在選擇和 什么樣的人交往也是至關(guān)重要的。簡而言之,二十歲是不能輕易揮霍的美好時光。”
這段關(guān)于20歲青年人如何看待人生的演講引起了許多TED粉絲的討論,來自TEDx組織團隊的David Webber就說:Meg指出最重要的一點便是青年人需要及早意識到積累經(jīng)驗和眼界,無論是20歲還是30歲,都是有利自己發(fā)展的重要事。”
以下是Meg的演講:
TED演講:二十歲是不可以揮霍的光陰
以下是Meg的演講內(nèi)容:
When I was in my 20s, I saw my very first psychotherapy client. I was a Ph.D. student in clinical psychology at Berkeley. She was a 26-year-old woman named Alex.
記得見我第一位心理咨詢顧客時,我才20多歲。當(dāng)時我是Berkeley臨床心理學(xué)在讀博士生。我的第一位顧客是名叫Alex的女性,26歲。
Now Alex walked into her first session wearing jeans and a big slouchy top, and she dropped onto the couch in my office and kicked off her flats and told me she was there to talk about guy problems. Now when I heard this, I was so relieved. My classmate got an arsonist for her first client. (Laughter) And I got a twentysomething who wanted to talk about boys. This I thought I could handle.
第一次見面Alex穿著牛仔褲和寬松上衣走進來,她一下子栽進我辦公室的沙發(fā)上,踢掉腳上的平底鞋,跟我說她想談?wù)勀猩膯栴}。當(dāng)時我聽到這個之后松了一口氣。因為我同學(xué)的第一個顧客是縱火犯,而我的顧客卻是一個20出頭想談?wù)勀猩呐?。我覺得我可以搞定。
But I didn't handle it. With the funny stories that Alex would bring to session, it was easy for me just to nod my head while we kicked the can down the road.
但是我沒有搞定。Alex不斷地講有趣的事情,而我只能簡單地點頭認同她所說的,很自然地就陷入了附和的狀態(tài)。
"Thirty's the new 20," Alex would say, and as far as I could tell, she was right. Work happened later, marriage happened later, kids happened later, even death happened later. Twentysomethings like Alex and I had nothing but time.
Alex說:“30歲是一個新的20歲”。沒錯,我告訴她“你是對的”。工作還早,結(jié)婚還早,生孩子還早,甚至死亡也早著呢。像Alex和我這樣20多歲的人,什么都沒有但時間多的是。
But before long, my supervisor pushed me to push Alex about her love life. I pushed back. I said, "Sure, she's dating down, she's sleeping with a knucklehead, but it's not like she's going to marry the guy." And then my supervisor said, "Not yet, but she might marry the next one. Besides, the best time to work on Alex's marriage is before she has one."
但不久之后,我的導(dǎo)師就要我向Alex的感情生活施壓。我反駁說:“當(dāng)然她現(xiàn)在正在和別人交往,她現(xiàn)在和一個傻瓜男生睡覺,但看樣子她不會和他結(jié)婚的。” 而我的導(dǎo)師說:“不著急,她也許會和下一個結(jié)婚。但修復(fù)Alex婚姻的最好時期是她還沒擁有婚姻的時期。”
That's what psychologists call an "Aha!" moment. That was the moment I realized, 30 is not the new 20. Yes, people settle down later than they used to, but that didn't make Alex's 20s a developmental downtime.
這就是心理學(xué)家說的“頓悟時刻”。正是那個時候我意識到,30歲不是一個新的20歲。的確,和以前的人相比,現(xiàn)在人們更晚才安定下來,但是這不代表Alex就能長期處于20多歲的狀態(tài)。