托福獨(dú)立寫作段落拓展-因果推理法
為了幫助大家掌握到托福寫作段落拓展的技巧,下面小編給大家?guī)硗懈*?dú)立寫作段落拓展 - 因果推理法,希望大家可以靈活運(yùn)用到自己的寫作中!
托福獨(dú)立寫作段落拓展 - 因果推理法
獨(dú)立寫作主要由同意反對(duì)、選擇較優(yōu)等題型組成。
看似簡(jiǎn)單的獨(dú)立寫作題目,想拿高分卻不是易事。成功的寫作不外乎滿足以下一些條件:
觀點(diǎn)合理、論點(diǎn)適宜、用詞用句準(zhǔn)確且多樣化、各種修飾部分交替使用等。
那么今天我來和大家分享下獨(dú)立寫作的一種基本論證方法-因果推理法。
所謂“因果推理法”,就是分析事情來龍去脈、深入探索事物間因果關(guān)系的論證方法。
巧妙運(yùn)用“因果推理法”可以使文章邏輯連貫、論證透徹嚴(yán)密。我們以下題為例:
Do you agree or disagree with the followingstatement?
Teachers should be paid according to how much theirstudents learn. Use specific reasons and examples to support your answer.
考生拿到這個(gè)題目的第一步就是大概確定一下自己的觀點(diǎn)。大多數(shù)學(xué)生都會(huì)想到反對(duì)面更好寫一點(diǎn)。然后經(jīng)過頭腦風(fēng)暴,大家可以很輕易地得出幾個(gè)分論點(diǎn),比如:學(xué)生能力不一致、評(píng)價(jià)學(xué)生學(xué)到多少很費(fèi)事等。那么我們就以“評(píng)價(jià)學(xué)生學(xué)到多少很費(fèi)事”這段文字為例,進(jìn)行討論和展開:
|關(guān)于“段落中心句”
段落分論點(diǎn)很容易想,但是要使論證得到閱卷人的信服卻不是一件容易的事情。
論證段第一步經(jīng)常是表明支撐自己觀點(diǎn)的分論點(diǎn),但前面說到的寫長(zhǎng)難句,并不代表“段落中心句”也應(yīng)該寫的很“曲折”,很“修飾”;相反,要直接明確地表明考生立場(chǎng),如:It isvery difficult and low efficient to decide how much students have learnt.但要注意一點(diǎn),獨(dú)立寫作評(píng)分標(biāo)準(zhǔn)當(dāng)中有用詞造句一項(xiàng),因此大家可以把一些用到爛大街的difficult,decide之類的單詞“華麗變身”一下,再把句型稍加調(diào)整,加一點(diǎn)修飾部分,就可得到如下“段落中心句”:To start with, the low efficiency in standardizing the evaluation methodsof teachers’incomes would be another formidable obstacle.
王老師小貼士
針對(duì)很多學(xué)生遇到的,不會(huì)寫“高大上”詞匯的問題,大家在練習(xí)的時(shí)候完全可以輸入中文,然后記下對(duì)應(yīng)的各種同義英文,累積之后,就能慢慢熟練運(yùn)用啦。
|關(guān)于“段落論證”
接下來我們要做的就是:把腦海中想到的分論點(diǎn)“效率低“,按照“因果推理法”成功推出“老師薪酬不該由學(xué)生學(xué)到的多少?zèng)Q定”。那么我們就開始思考,為什么效率低就說老師薪酬不該由學(xué)生學(xué)到的多少來決定呢?Bang!!! 想到如下:
評(píng)測(cè)學(xué)生學(xué)到多少非常困難
——為什么呢——
老師帶的學(xué)生太多
要評(píng)測(cè)所有學(xué)生的學(xué)習(xí)效果太費(fèi)事
——為什么呢——
即使完成了一批學(xué)生的評(píng)測(cè)
但畢業(yè)之后,又要開始繁瑣的評(píng)測(cè)過程,勞民傷財(cái)
——那又怎樣——
按照學(xué)生學(xué)到的多少給老師薪酬不合理
因此,我們不難發(fā)現(xiàn):上述分析過程中的“為什么呢”(why,原因狀語從句)和“那又怎樣”(so what,結(jié)果狀語從句)構(gòu)成了段落的“因果鏈”。
而“因果推理法”就是對(duì)段落“因果鏈”的拓展和論證。
|關(guān)于“論證語言”
在“論證語言”方面,考生不要一成不變地采取主動(dòng)句型;多采用副詞或者并列副詞去修飾形容詞或動(dòng)詞性成分等。同時(shí),避免一個(gè)單詞用到底,最好可以做到用詞多樣化;這樣做的話,既給人一種詞匯量比較好的印象,也可以使文章看起來更生動(dòng):像下面的范文里面,process/procedure之類的同義詞。按照上面的“因果鏈”,我們得到下面作為大家參考的論證段的“因果推理法”論證部分(紅色部分“地道”表達(dá)):
Social improvement leads us to carry out a plan or policy in a more strictway, based on the regulations and rulesthoroughly researched, not to mention theones related to education that plays a pivotal role in a nation’s development.The academic variability of students’ performances negatively influences thestandardizing processes of teachers’ payment system that cannot lay its foundation on an unstable source. In fact,there are always many students, sometimes up to hundreds, being instructed by ateacher, so it becomes very difficult and low-efficient to measure to what extent every student has learned.Moreover, even if the measuring procedures have been successfully accomplished,considering the fact that students graduatefrom an educational institution in a few years, mainly rangingfrom three to six, it means that the assessment criteria should bereformulated.
|注意事項(xiàng)
①平時(shí)多積累同義詞,這樣在表述自己觀點(diǎn)時(shí)更游刃有余;
②注意語法基礎(chǔ)的積累,做到造句時(shí),定語,狀語,補(bǔ)語靈活使用;
③一定要找一個(gè)人改自己作文,因?yàn)榇蠹叶贾酪迷~多樣化、要長(zhǎng)難句、要主謂一致等等語法知識(shí),但是往往學(xué)生在寫作過程中總是無意犯很多語法、用詞方面的錯(cuò)誤。因此,有一個(gè)人指導(dǎo),指正,對(duì)于大家寫作水平的進(jìn)步有巨大的益處。
托福寫作經(jīng)典的五段式結(jié)構(gòu)是什么
常用iBT文章結(jié)構(gòu)-適用于comparison & contrast essay和argument essay.
不論是comparison & contrast essay還是argument essay,它們的文章結(jié)構(gòu)基本相同。分為3大部分和5段結(jié)構(gòu)(Point-by-Point Format), 也許有人喜歡4段(即Block Format),但就初來乍到者,我還是建議他們使用Point-by-Point Format, 并且依據(jù)我老師的經(jīng)驗(yàn)(Jeff)來看,北美人更加喜歡這種結(jié)構(gòu)(其實(shí)因?yàn)檫@些老外每天都要批閱幾十篇文章,他們已經(jīng)不閱讀文章的內(nèi)容,僅僅是審查文章的結(jié)構(gòu)和詞匯,他們沒有時(shí)間去對(duì)比Block Format結(jié)構(gòu)中的問題或者論點(diǎn)),這令我很吃驚,這與國(guó)內(nèi)老師的意見相駁或者相反。
這篇經(jīng)驗(yàn)我想用一個(gè)例子(Coffee and tea)來向大家解釋,有可能我的例子不是很好,或者論點(diǎn)有些可笑,不過我想大家還是要記住,老外已經(jīng)在iBT中說明,他們不關(guān)心你的論點(diǎn)(Issue/Top Sentences) 和論據(jù)(Details/Evidence)是否合情合理,只關(guān)心你的論據(jù)(Details/Evidence)是否可以證明你的論點(diǎn),僅此而已。大家在稍后的文章中可以看到,我的3個(gè)論點(diǎn)中的2個(gè)比較controversial, 但是,在我的Detail中支持的好就可以了。
首先,談一談5段式結(jié)構(gòu)和Body Paragraph的結(jié)構(gòu):
Introduction Paragraph:Say what you are going to say.
這個(gè)我想不用我多說了,就是文章的“引子”,你的文章是否有高分,這個(gè)很重要。這樣的句子不要出現(xiàn),例如:In my essay, I will demonstrate…。下面的句子Jeff稱之為Ok Sentence,即可以出現(xiàn)的句子,例如:Tea is the best drink in the world. 或者可以使用五星級(jí)的句子,例如:Although Coke is becoming more popular, it can not replace China’s love of tea.
Background / Definition: 重新描述問題,但是不要使用老外給你的題目原話,這里我可以說,如果你使用了原話,不會(huì)對(duì)你的文章產(chǎn)生任何不好的影響,只是你不會(huì)在這里拿到應(yīng)該得到的分?jǐn)?shù)而已。你可以寫成為 Tea is the most popular hot drink in the world.
Thesis: 中心句,如果文章不是argument essay,請(qǐng)不要直接在句子中表達(dá)自己的意見或者用一種General的形式來表達(dá)大家的意見, 例如:Tea is the world’s favorite drink because it provides health benefits, it is less expensive, and it is available in many varieties.
Forecasting: 見關(guān)鍵詞解釋。Because后面的3個(gè)簡(jiǎn)單句就是Forecasting。
Body Paragraph I:
Top Sentence: First,Tea is healthier to drink. (OK-Sentence)Jeff推薦的句子Drank by million of people, tea is… (分詞開頭-ed),再如:Improving your health, tea is drank…(動(dòng)名詞開頭-ing),又如:For thousands of years, tea is…(General 開頭)
Detail: 這個(gè)不用多說了,就是要把你的例子舉出來了。For example, people who drink tea, live longer, healthier lives than these who drink coffee.
Befriend:這個(gè)是重點(diǎn)了,要把拳頭收回來。例如:Although coffee is good for your health, it cause heart attacks in large amounts.
Support:這個(gè)時(shí)候需要你利用你事實(shí)作為拳頭伸出去,例如:In fact, heart attacks are one of the leading causes of death, so tea is a better drink according to doctor’s suggestion.
Concluding Sentence:最后要簡(jiǎn)單扼要的總結(jié)一下,你在這段的論點(diǎn)和論據(jù),其原理就像是簡(jiǎn)易書架,你只有兩邊都有支撐的面,你的書才不會(huì)向沒有支撐面的那邊倒去??赡苡行┡笥颜J(rèn)為這個(gè)比較麻煩或者多余,不過我還是建議大家要包含這個(gè)部分,例如:To sum up, tea is healthier in several ways compared to coffee.
Body Paragraph II: 結(jié)構(gòu)如上述,我就不多說了。
Body Paragraph III: 同上。
Conclusion Paragraph: 關(guān)于Conclusion我還是要多說兩句,通常老外喜歡用Conclusion作為整篇文章的結(jié)尾用詞,而用to sum up等作為段落的總結(jié)。例如:Despite the fact that coffee consumption is increasing, it will never be as beneficial as tea. Tea is less expensive, comes in more varieties, and is healthier. In conclusion, tea will remain the best drink until humans invent something better.
順便提及一下,有的朋友會(huì)問,是否可以變化一下Body Paragraph的結(jié)構(gòu),我的建議是不要變化,不信的話,您可以自己嘗試一下把你的文章重新排一下,您就會(huì)知道這里面的區(qū)別了。
再談一下comparison & contrast essay 和argument essay的區(qū)別:
在我看來,它們之間的區(qū)別有兩點(diǎn)。第一點(diǎn),作者的視角不同。何謂視角不同?即當(dāng)你寫argument essay的時(shí)候,你需要在Introduction Paragraph中的Thesis中表達(dá)作者支持哪一方面。第二點(diǎn),對(duì)比方面在文章中所占的份額,即如果你在寫comparison & contrast essay時(shí),比例為40%(一方面的優(yōu)點(diǎn))和60%(另一方面的優(yōu)點(diǎn)和缺點(diǎn)),雖然是comparison & contrast essay, 但是我想作為作者,你怎么也要表達(dá)一下自己的意見或者意圖,讓讀者明白你是雖然在作兩件事物的比較,但是還是有你的偏好在里面(喜歡Reading的朋友會(huì)有這種體會(huì))。在寫argument essay 時(shí),比例為10%(敵對(duì)方的缺點(diǎn))和90%(支持方的優(yōu)點(diǎn)針對(duì)敵方缺點(diǎn)和無傷大雅的支持方缺點(diǎn))。
最后談一下在我們寫作是要注意的問題。
1. 要多使用連接詞來轉(zhuǎn)換讀者的視角和給出你自己的例子。不要讓讀者自己通過文章內(nèi)容來轉(zhuǎn)換視角,這樣的文章不適用于考試,而適用于你自己的寫作中或者長(zhǎng)篇論文中。
2. 通常,我都是在寫開頭的時(shí)候,順便把文章的結(jié)尾一并寫好,因?yàn)槲恼麻_頭和結(jié)尾的結(jié)構(gòu)相似??梢怨?jié)省時(shí)間。
3. 一定要花時(shí)間來檢查文章中的詞匯是否正確以及必要的時(shí)候要用更好的句型來優(yōu)化你的寫作。有很多朋友覺得時(shí)間不夠,所以不檢查自己的文章,我想既然你用鍵盤輸入你的文章,就一定有錯(cuò)誤的時(shí)候,況且那個(gè)時(shí)候比較緊張。我作為視計(jì)算機(jī)為自己一部分的人,每次給客戶,朋友和同事回信的時(shí)候,我都要檢查一下。以免讓人家笑話或者引起爭(zhēng)議。
托福寫作怎樣安排組織結(jié)構(gòu)
首先由明線入手的思路可以不太講究結(jié)構(gòu),這點(diǎn)的評(píng)論請(qǐng)看后文;然而由暗線著手的議論卻必須注意結(jié)構(gòu),因?yàn)榘稻€采用的是和題目本身關(guān)系不大的視角,寫得好是一氣呵成發(fā)人深省,寫得不慎重就會(huì)失之毫厘,謬之千里,走題走到天邊去。
接上文,仍以題目做示范。筆者第二次擬提綱,以理暗渡,就不能像第一次一樣只寫論點(diǎn),而得把首段,論點(diǎn),甚至每段在整篇文章中的作用也一并寫出,才能避免下筆時(shí)走題。
首段:民以食為天,食物在人類生活中的重要性不可言喻,就連食物的準(zhǔn)備方式也可能極大影響人類文化,進(jìn)而影響個(gè)人生活質(zhì)量(引入社會(huì)心理學(xué),設(shè)置暗線,為全文奠定基調(diào))以現(xiàn)代生活實(shí)況分析,食品速食化導(dǎo)致人類生活質(zhì)量下降的趨向比較明顯。
第一論證段:(身體健康層面)飲食文化改變,傳統(tǒng)有益健康而消耗時(shí)間的料理方式被擯棄,垃圾食品大行其市,天人合一,順應(yīng)生理規(guī)律的文化被斷絕。(注:這里因?yàn)椴皇菑臓I(yíng)養(yǎng),而是從生物規(guī)律論述對(duì)身體的影響,所以前文所論的paradox此處可不考慮)
第二論證段:從速食流行原因論證人類行為文化改變, 高節(jié)奏的高壓生活必然促使身體早衰(身體與心理健康兩個(gè)層面綜合)
第三論證段:(心理健康層面)行為高速化也會(huì)導(dǎo)致對(duì)情感的無法顧及甚至冷漠,人類情感文化變化,并且朝不利方向。
結(jié)尾(這在提綱里其實(shí)可有可無,提綱畢竟只是具體化的思路,并不是成文。依照文章具體的論證手法,內(nèi)容,結(jié)尾可以個(gè)有千秋,只要把握住一條,符合全文主旨,就可以了,提綱里就算寫了,很多時(shí)候也是無用功)
用題目分析到這里,文章連雛形都已經(jīng)出來了,可是究竟什么是結(jié)構(gòu)呢?
回到“文章是被記錄下來的表達(dá)”這個(gè)原則。結(jié)構(gòu)既然是寫作的必須注意事項(xiàng),就必然幫助表達(dá)。對(duì)于一篇議論,作者必須大量旁征博引才能令人信服得表述自己的觀點(diǎn),這其中牽扯著概念的重要性順序-----用來證明全文立場(chǎng)的概念是論點(diǎn),是最重要的概念;用來證明論點(diǎn)的概念是佐證,是次等重要的概念。所謂結(jié)構(gòu),最基本的用途是將文章所有用入的概念分段,一個(gè)論點(diǎn)與它的所有佐證為一段,不能佐證證明的是第二論點(diǎn),卻在第一論點(diǎn)的段落。-------這就是所謂的unity.
結(jié)構(gòu)的第二用途仍然是幫助表達(dá),從邏輯思路方面。好的議論能抓住人心,令人信服,首先必須讓人能看懂作者的思路,讓你說明在學(xué)習(xí)場(chǎng)所安裝電視有無弊端,你卻一會(huì)說電視節(jié)目的差異,一會(huì)說學(xué)生的素質(zhì)如何,讀者不知所云,自然不會(huì)被你說服。每個(gè)段落和論題的聯(lián)系。作者本人知道并沒有用,必須表現(xiàn)出來。說完節(jié)目差異加一句“不同節(jié)目對(duì)學(xué)生的利弊不同,不可一概而論”,講過學(xué)生素質(zhì)補(bǔ)充“素質(zhì)差的學(xué)生群體使學(xué)習(xí)場(chǎng)所吵雜,安不安電視影響都不大”,將論點(diǎn)間,論點(diǎn)和論題間緊密結(jié)合起來,保證文章思路流暢,明白易懂,就是結(jié)構(gòu)中過渡句的功效,使得行文達(dá)到ETS要求的progression和coherence。
具體把結(jié)構(gòu)落實(shí)在IBT獨(dú)立作文上,就是兩點(diǎn)。
1.會(huì)分段。要清楚自己的行文思路,知道自己有幾個(gè)論點(diǎn)。首段表明論點(diǎn),廢話不要講。論證一段一個(gè)論點(diǎn),不可以交叉。一個(gè)論段里要有論點(diǎn)句,其它所有句子都為論證這個(gè)點(diǎn),廢話不要講。尾段總結(jié)論點(diǎn)共性,映證首段觀點(diǎn),廢話不要講……
2.會(huì)過渡。要記住必須過渡。要明白你為什么過渡-----如果這個(gè)過渡不證明論點(diǎn)和論題間的關(guān)系,而證明論點(diǎn)間的關(guān)系,要確定這個(gè)新論點(diǎn)也能證明論題。你的過渡不是為自己的文章過渡,而是幫讀者的思維過渡,引領(lǐng)他們走進(jìn)新的思維,所以必須確認(rèn)過渡的方向,你是否正帶著你的讀者而離開你的論題。
從這兩點(diǎn)觀測(cè),筆者在前文提到的明線(支持論題)貫穿的思路在擬提綱時(shí)不需要注意結(jié)構(gòu),就好解釋了。因?yàn)槊骶€的論點(diǎn)注定不會(huì)跑題,不用太在意過渡問題,只要分段恰當(dāng)就可以了,而這點(diǎn),下筆時(shí)留神就足夠了。
托福范文:舞蹈在文化中的作用
[題目]
Do you agree or disagree with the following statement? Dancing plays an important role in a culture. Use specific reasons and examples to support your answer.
[參考范文]舞蹈在文化中起到重要的作用,同意與否?
Around the world, people gather to explore their emotions through dance. The dances are created as part of celebrations, as religious services, as preparation for challenging hunts and warfare and to express sorrow (less often than the other situations). Indeed, dance does play an important role within a culture and reveals a wide range of information about the characteristics of a culture. Three of the most revealing aspects of dance are the nature of the culture's symbols and art forms revealed in costumes and equipment, the body language (moves and gestures) which give information about social contact behaviors and frequently the style of preferred music for the culture.
Ethnic dances, and certainly popular dancing, anywhere around the world have associated preferences for costumes and special clothing. Through dancing, the participants are able to reveal and express their chosen role in the garments they choose; social roles in the dance are shown public ally to the observers as well as the other dancers. Frequently dancers utilize objects like swords or sticks or hoops or musical instruments to further reveal information about their role in the social story portrayed in the dance. Items such as special headwear and jewelry are further examples of the garments that in general express preferences and culturally significant details about the particular culture.
Dancers, by the very nature of the activity, physically express beliefs and attitudes associated with their specific culture. In many dances the participants are modeling typical activities of their culture and thus imparting instructions and historical information to the audience.
In other dances, one can see expressions of deep emotion: love, worship, grief, strength, anger, etc. and thus obtain clues about the inner feelings of the culture's individuals. Dance provides an opportunity for others to witness some of the special behaviors associated with activities in the culture. Also, dance is a (usually) public statement so that observers can see how members of the culture treat those who are older members of the opposite sex, more respected members, etc.
The third aspect of dance that reveals much about a culture is the music or singing that is typically a part of the event. Observers can see evidence of the of the types of instruments characteristics of the culture, and who plays these instruments as well as how they are used —— instruments may be associated only with special events and thus transmit valuable cultural information. Frequently singing is part of a dance program, and again an observer has an opportunity to observe who is singing and the nature of the voices. I found this aspect of dance particularly fascinating during a brief time I spent in a rural village in Zimbabwe a few years ago.
Dancing is indeed a very important aspect of any culture. It provides a communal opportunity for members of the culture to artistically express emotions while acting out typical activities and concerns in their world. For outsider observers, many valuable details about the culture are revealed。
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